1
00:00:16,040 --> 00:00:18,200
<i>Me and baby brother</i>

2
00:00:19,120 --> 00:00:21,540
<i>Used to run together</i>

3
00:00:24,700 --> 00:00:26,700
<i>Me and baby brother</i>

4
00:00:27,870 --> 00:00:29,870
<i>Used to run together</i>

5
00:00:30,450 --> 00:00:33,040
<i>Hey, hey, hey, hey, yeah</i>

6
00:00:33,120 --> 00:00:35,160
<i>Welcome one another</i>

7
00:00:36,330 --> 00:00:38,450
<i>Headed for the corner</i>

8
00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:41,250
<i>Hey, hey, yeah</i>

9
00:00:41,330 --> 00:00:45,000
<i>Shiftin' on his mind
Is like drinking funky wine</i>

10
00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:46,620
<i>By the river</i>

11
00:00:49,660 --> 00:00:53,540
<i>Chippin' on his mind
Is like drinking funky wine</i>...

12
00:00:53,620 --> 00:00:55,160
Brothers for life.

13
00:00:56,540 --> 00:00:58,410
- Marcus?
- Mm.

14
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:00,250
Where are you going?

15
00:01:00,330 --> 00:01:03,000
I'm getting out of here, man.
My brother needs me.

16
00:01:03,080 --> 00:01:04,790
Are you sure that's a good idea?

17
00:01:04,870 --> 00:01:06,870
Look at the last email he sent.

18
00:01:06,950 --> 00:01:08,330
"Wish you were here."

19
00:01:08,410 --> 00:01:10,330
"Hit me up if you're ever in New York."

20
00:01:10,410 --> 00:01:13,540
He's got too much pride to admit it,
but this is a cry for help.

21
00:01:13,620 --> 00:01:16,410
It feels like
you're reading too much into this.

22
00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:19,910
Why don't we see what Matilda thinks?

23
00:01:21,620 --> 00:01:24,250
She says to follow your heart.

24
00:01:24,330 --> 00:01:25,540
Thanks, Matilda.

25
00:01:26,290 --> 00:01:27,410
Goodbye, Keith.

26
00:01:27,910 --> 00:01:29,660
- Here. You take her.
- Oh.

27
00:01:29,750 --> 00:01:32,120
She's a very generous lover.

28
00:01:32,950 --> 00:01:34,540
No, you keep her.

29
00:01:35,580 --> 00:01:36,790
You're <i>her</i> rock.

30
00:02:01,580 --> 00:02:03,540
Shit. Where am I?

31
00:02:15,200 --> 00:02:16,830
Time for plan B.

32
00:02:24,370 --> 00:02:26,040
No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no.

33
00:02:26,120 --> 00:02:27,370
No, no, no, no, no!

34
00:02:28,580 --> 00:02:31,250
I know. I'm worried about him too.

35
00:02:40,500 --> 00:02:42,080
Oh shit.

36
00:02:42,160 --> 00:02:43,540
Whoo!

37
00:02:44,160 --> 00:02:45,750
I'm coming for you, big bro.

38
00:02:57,870 --> 00:02:59,410
- How do I look?
- Hmm?

39
00:02:59,500 --> 00:03:02,160
- I should be standing when they come in.
- Uh... What do you mean?

40
00:03:02,250 --> 00:03:04,790
These are big-time TV people, Mia.
They care about image.

41
00:03:04,870 --> 00:03:07,000
- Right.
- What do you think about this?

42
00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:09,410
Coat buttoned.

43
00:03:09,910 --> 00:03:10,790
This.

44
00:03:10,870 --> 00:03:12,290
Oh. Uh...

45
00:03:12,370 --> 00:03:15,450
That... Maybe the legs closer together.

46
00:03:15,540 --> 00:03:16,580
It's too much?

47
00:03:16,660 --> 00:03:20,160
Okay, what if I stand, uh... sideways?
You know, head down, thoughtful, solemn.

48
00:03:20,250 --> 00:03:21,870
When they come in, I could--

49
00:03:21,950 --> 00:03:24,200
Rudd... relax.

50
00:03:24,290 --> 00:03:26,910
These people want you on their show
because of who you are,

51
00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:27,950
not how you look.

52
00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:31,500
'Cause of the real estate business
that you built from the ground up.

53
00:03:31,580 --> 00:03:34,830
You don't have to put on a show for them.
You <i>are</i> the show.

54
00:03:34,910 --> 00:03:36,450
- Really?
- Absolutely.

55
00:03:36,540 --> 00:03:39,620
And, as your assistant,
I have the best seat in the house.

56
00:03:39,700 --> 00:03:42,080
Mia, I couldn't do any of this
without you.

57
00:03:42,160 --> 00:03:44,250
- Thank you.
- There he is!

58
00:03:44,330 --> 00:03:46,290
- Hey!
- There's our superstar.

59
00:03:46,370 --> 00:03:47,950
- Great to see you.
- Wow.

60
00:03:48,040 --> 00:03:50,540
Rudd, I forgot how humongous
you are in person, brother.

61
00:03:50,620 --> 00:03:52,410
Yeah, he's built like a duplex, isn't he?

62
00:03:52,500 --> 00:03:55,330
Yes. I am terrified of you right now.

63
00:03:55,910 --> 00:03:58,950
- Yeah, you're like a freak from a lab.
- Yeah. Way too big.

64
00:03:59,040 --> 00:04:00,000
Big ol' guy.

65
00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:01,750
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

66
00:04:01,830 --> 00:04:04,160
So, uh, we gonna do this?
Did I make the cut?

67
00:04:04,830 --> 00:04:06,160
Why tell you when we can show you?

68
00:04:06,250 --> 00:04:07,750
- Come on. Have a seat.
- Yeah.

69
00:04:09,870 --> 00:04:12,290
<i>This season on</i> NYC Hustlers<i>,</i>

70
00:04:12,370 --> 00:04:15,250
<i>Hayley Boyajian
and Kieran Francis are back.</i>

71
00:04:15,330 --> 00:04:16,660
I have a foot fetish.

72
00:04:16,750 --> 00:04:18,290
A square-foot fetish.

73
00:04:20,410 --> 00:04:23,450
After a battle with brain cancer,
my father tragically passed away.

74
00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:26,700
But on the flip side,
I sold a condo to his radiologist.

75
00:04:26,790 --> 00:04:29,370
<i>But there's a new agent
on the New York scene.</i>

76
00:04:29,450 --> 00:04:31,410
<i>His name is Rudd Landy.</i>

77
00:04:31,500 --> 00:04:35,040
<i>And he didn't come to play nice.
He came to close deals.</i>

78
00:04:35,120 --> 00:04:38,660
<i>I built my firm from the ground up,
brick by brick, one listing at a time.</i>

79
00:04:38,750 --> 00:04:40,830
<i>Just a chubby kid from New Jersey</i>

80
00:04:40,910 --> 00:04:43,120
<i>with nothing more
than a real estate license and a dream.</i>

81
00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:46,000
<i>And if that name
sounds familiar to you, it should.</i>

82
00:04:46,080 --> 00:04:47,540
<i>Rudd is the kid brother</i>

83
00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:50,540
<i>of billionaire hedge fund manager
and man-about-town</i>...

84
00:04:51,620 --> 00:04:53,250
<i>...Josh Landy.</i>

85
00:04:53,950 --> 00:04:56,580
<i>DJ, philanthropist, money mogul.</i>

86
00:04:56,660 --> 00:04:58,370
<i>He does it all.</i>

87
00:04:58,450 --> 00:04:59,620
<i>In other words,</i>

88
00:04:59,700 --> 00:05:02,700
<i>Rudd has a chip on his shoulder
the size of the Big Apple.</i>

89
00:05:03,290 --> 00:05:05,040
I may be the new kid on the block,

90
00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:08,120
but I'll do anything to get out
of my big brother's shadow.

91
00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:12,000
<i>Will Rudd remain
the one Landy with something to prove?</i>

92
00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:16,290
<i>Find out on this season of</i> NYC Hustlers.

93
00:05:16,370 --> 00:05:18,290
So good.

94
00:05:18,370 --> 00:05:19,660
Look at him, speechless.

95
00:05:19,750 --> 00:05:22,040
He's speechless. Pretty exciting, huh?

96
00:05:23,250 --> 00:05:27,200
Yeah. Um... I don't remember saying
that thing about my brother's shadow.

97
00:05:27,290 --> 00:05:28,330
Yeah, you didn't.

98
00:05:28,410 --> 00:05:30,750
We, uh... we used AI
to add in some dialogue for you.

99
00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:33,870
Isn't that cool? We do it all the time.
It's just temp though. Don't worry.

100
00:05:33,950 --> 00:05:35,370
We have options.

101
00:05:36,040 --> 00:05:39,290
<i>I got these big muscles
so I could feel like a big boy,</i>

102
00:05:39,370 --> 00:05:41,290
<i>and not my brother's little bitch
for once.</i>

103
00:05:43,080 --> 00:05:46,040
- I love that one.
- It's so good. It's <i>so</i> relatable.

104
00:05:46,120 --> 00:05:48,410
I mean, my heart... ...aches for you.

105
00:05:48,500 --> 00:05:50,410
Always in second place. Always overlooked.

106
00:05:50,500 --> 00:05:53,330
But now, here's your chance
to finally shine.

107
00:05:54,250 --> 00:05:56,750
- Yeah, um--
- No, hey, hey, please. Don't hold back.

108
00:05:56,830 --> 00:05:58,330
We love feedback. Give us feedback.

109
00:05:58,910 --> 00:06:00,540
Uh...

110
00:06:00,620 --> 00:06:02,950
Maybe less Josh, you know? Maybe more me?

111
00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:06,750
- How much less?
- Yeah, like, what percent less?

112
00:06:06,830 --> 00:06:09,250
Like, zero, maybe? Like, maybe zero Josh?

113
00:06:09,330 --> 00:06:11,200
And then... and then I'd go up to a hundred.

114
00:06:11,290 --> 00:06:14,540
Right, so you don't wanna be
overshadowed by your brother.

115
00:06:14,620 --> 00:06:16,950
Kind of exactly what the intro was saying...

116
00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:19,040
Yep, I'm struggling to see the issue here.

117
00:06:19,120 --> 00:06:22,870
Look, guys... I am super pumped
for this opportunity, okay?

118
00:06:22,950 --> 00:06:25,950
I know what being on your show
could do for me and do for my firm.

119
00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:28,080
I'll tell you this right now.
I will crush this.

120
00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:30,950
Because I am ready
to run with the big dogs.

121
00:06:32,040 --> 00:06:34,040
But if this is the angle we're going with,

122
00:06:34,120 --> 00:06:36,370
I'm sorry,
I just don't think it's a good fit.

123
00:06:37,870 --> 00:06:39,040
Wow.

124
00:06:39,120 --> 00:06:41,200
- I think what Rudd means--
- Did you feel that, Lenore?

125
00:06:41,290 --> 00:06:43,080
Oh, I felt that. Mm-hmm.

126
00:06:43,160 --> 00:06:46,120
- <i>That's</i>... our angle right there.
- Yeah.

127
00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:49,000
That's it. If you can bring
that big dog energy to our show,

128
00:06:49,080 --> 00:06:50,120
we won't even need Josh.

129
00:06:50,200 --> 00:06:51,700
- Mm-mm.
- I'll bring that energy.

130
00:06:51,790 --> 00:06:53,370
I will be the big dog.

131
00:06:53,450 --> 00:06:54,540
Ah.

132
00:06:56,290 --> 00:06:58,000
No.

133
00:06:58,080 --> 00:07:00,580
- That is a lapdog.
- Not what he was trying to give.

134
00:07:00,660 --> 00:07:02,040
Right, big dog?

135
00:07:02,120 --> 00:07:03,000
Right.

136
00:07:05,700 --> 00:07:08,160
<i>Hey, brother. I've been thinking.</i>

137
00:07:08,250 --> 00:07:10,290
<i>It's been a while
since we've seen each other,</i>

138
00:07:10,370 --> 00:07:14,950
<i>and I know our schedules
haven't really aligned, like, ever.</i>

139
00:07:15,040 --> 00:07:18,500
<i>But I was reading your last email,
and I had an epiphany.</i>

140
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:22,580
<i>At the end, when you said,
"see you later," it made me think,</i>

141
00:07:22,660 --> 00:07:25,450
<i>"What if later was right now?"</i>

142
00:07:27,200 --> 00:07:29,580
<i>The thing is,
my life is actually pretty great.</i>

143
00:07:29,660 --> 00:07:31,700
<i>-I've been traveling a lot lately.</i>
- Whoa!

144
00:07:31,790 --> 00:07:34,120
<i>Spending more time in nature,</i>

145
00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:35,500
<i>making new friends.</i>

146
00:07:36,500 --> 00:07:38,830
Oh, good morning.

147
00:07:38,910 --> 00:07:40,580
You can play through.

148
00:07:46,750 --> 00:07:48,580
Hey. How's everything tasting?

149
00:07:48,660 --> 00:07:51,250
- Oh, are you our waiter?
- No, just curious.

150
00:07:52,410 --> 00:07:56,290
<i>Anyway, I know how busy you are,
so I'm doing us both a favor.</i>

151
00:07:56,370 --> 00:07:59,200
<i>That's right.
I'm coming to see</i> you<i>, big bro!</i>

152
00:07:59,290 --> 00:08:00,450
Whoa!

153
00:08:00,540 --> 00:08:02,790
<i>I was gonna surprise you
and show up at your door,</i>

154
00:08:02,870 --> 00:08:04,500
<i>but I was just too damn excited.</i>

155
00:08:04,580 --> 00:08:07,120
<i>Like when you don't jerk it for a week
and finally see your girl</i>

156
00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:10,250
<i>and can't even get it out of your pants
before busting all over the place.</i>

157
00:08:10,330 --> 00:08:11,620
What the fuck are you doing?

158
00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:13,950
I asked you to watch my laptop
while I was in the bathroom.

159
00:08:14,040 --> 00:08:16,830
Hang on one sec, bud.
Just in the middle of a thought here.

160
00:08:16,910 --> 00:08:20,910
"Busting all over the place."

161
00:08:24,120 --> 00:08:26,040
<i>Coming to see you, big bro!</i>

162
00:08:27,200 --> 00:08:28,620
Shit.

163
00:08:28,700 --> 00:08:30,410
Hey, Mia. You coming?

164
00:08:30,910 --> 00:08:33,250
From now on,
we put all our focus on this show.

165
00:08:33,330 --> 00:08:35,290
- Could be a real game changer for us.
- So exciting.

166
00:08:35,370 --> 00:08:38,410
And even if an unexpected distraction
were to pop up, we could just--

167
00:08:38,500 --> 00:08:41,500
- Mia, you know I don't like surprises.
- Right.

168
00:08:41,580 --> 00:08:43,790
Whatever comes up,
I trust you to handle it.

169
00:08:43,870 --> 00:08:45,870
The faster we get going on this thing,

170
00:08:45,950 --> 00:08:48,660
the more damage
even the smallest obstacle can present.

171
00:08:48,750 --> 00:08:50,950
Did you know if an F1 racer
hits a pebble at full speed,

172
00:08:51,040 --> 00:08:52,830
the car will literally explode?

173
00:08:52,910 --> 00:08:54,620
- It will?
- Yeah, it will.

174
00:08:54,700 --> 00:08:57,700
That's why it's your job to get rid
of all the pebbles. You were saying?

175
00:08:57,790 --> 00:08:59,200
Um... I was...

176
00:08:59,290 --> 00:09:01,200
I was just saying that, uh,

177
00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:05,080
your car is... is waiting for you outside.

178
00:09:05,580 --> 00:09:07,290
Thought I heard
something pretty out there.

179
00:09:18,660 --> 00:09:19,500
Shit.

180
00:09:29,450 --> 00:09:31,870
New York City, here I come!

181
00:09:31,950 --> 00:09:34,620
<i>Woo, woo, dee, dee, dee</i>

182
00:09:34,700 --> 00:09:36,160
Oh yeah.

183
00:09:36,250 --> 00:09:37,500
Oh, look at these cuties.

184
00:09:43,870 --> 00:09:45,160
Brothers!

185
00:09:59,750 --> 00:10:02,080
Deirdre, this event... Wow. It's incredible.

186
00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:05,080
- I'm so proud of you.
- Aw! Hey, how was your meeting?

187
00:10:06,330 --> 00:10:09,250
- We start shooting in two days.
- What? Are you serious?

188
00:10:09,330 --> 00:10:10,450
Yes.

189
00:10:10,540 --> 00:10:12,660
I'm finally gonna be
playing in the big leagues.

190
00:10:12,750 --> 00:10:14,120
I just... I want you to know

191
00:10:14,200 --> 00:10:16,910
that all the sacrifices
we've been making as a family,

192
00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:18,580
they are about to pay off big-time.

193
00:10:18,660 --> 00:10:20,370
I am so happy for you.

194
00:10:21,200 --> 00:10:24,000
Okay, better get back to work.
I still have more asses I need to kiss.

195
00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:27,370
- Do your thing. Where am I sitting?
- Table five. Your brother's there already.

196
00:10:27,450 --> 00:10:28,870
Yes!

197
00:10:28,950 --> 00:10:30,870
He goes, "This is the castle
that Castle built."

198
00:10:30,950 --> 00:10:34,370
How do I look? Does my face look puffy?
He always points out if my face is puffy.

199
00:10:34,450 --> 00:10:36,500
Rudd, you look great. Okay?
All right? I promise.

200
00:10:36,580 --> 00:10:38,250
Clooney and I are drinking buddies.

201
00:10:38,330 --> 00:10:39,870
Go get him.

202
00:10:39,950 --> 00:10:42,080
I said,
"Thank you so much for the briefcase."

203
00:10:42,160 --> 00:10:43,830
And he goes, "Did you open it?"

204
00:10:43,910 --> 00:10:46,950
There was a million dollars inside.
I thought the briefcase was the gift!

205
00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:49,330
Oh, there's a gift. Hey! There he is.

206
00:10:49,410 --> 00:10:50,750
Get over here, big man.

207
00:10:50,830 --> 00:10:53,250
Oh! Hey, you look tremendous.

208
00:10:53,330 --> 00:10:56,040
What happened to your face?
You gain weight? Looks good.

209
00:10:56,120 --> 00:10:58,250
- Do you work for Josh?
- What? Who, him?

210
00:10:58,330 --> 00:11:01,580
No, this is my baby brother.
Rudd Landy. He's a realtor.

211
00:11:02,160 --> 00:11:03,160
Oh.

212
00:11:03,660 --> 00:11:07,160
<i>And</i> I found out I'm gonna be
on this season of <i>NYC Hustlers</i>.

213
00:11:07,250 --> 00:11:10,120
Oh my God. That is amazing.
Remind me, what is that again?

214
00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:12,540
It's... it's a big reality show.

215
00:11:12,620 --> 00:11:16,410
That's perfect for you!
That's exactly what you should be doing.

216
00:11:16,500 --> 00:11:18,370
People love that reality stuff.

217
00:11:18,450 --> 00:11:21,330
It helps them forget
how shitty their lives are.

218
00:11:21,410 --> 00:11:23,330
Hey, congrats. You deserve it.

219
00:11:23,910 --> 00:11:26,870
- Thanks.
- So are you selling Josh's house?

220
00:11:26,950 --> 00:11:28,620
- Ah...
- You're selling your house?

221
00:11:28,700 --> 00:11:31,450
Yeah, it's time. She's been good to me.
But, you know, yeah, look.

222
00:11:31,540 --> 00:11:33,870
Nah. He doesn't wanna be
listing his older bro's place.

223
00:11:33,950 --> 00:11:36,700
He definitely doesn't wanna be
dealing with Business Josh.

224
00:11:36,790 --> 00:11:37,910
"Below asking?!"

225
00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:40,040
Whoa! "Below" this!

226
00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:41,200
Whoa!

227
00:11:44,040 --> 00:11:45,410
Wow.

228
00:11:45,500 --> 00:11:48,200
$5,000 from the Blumenfelds.

229
00:11:48,290 --> 00:11:50,750
That is gonna go such a long way.

230
00:11:50,830 --> 00:11:51,660
Thank you.

231
00:11:51,750 --> 00:11:54,250
I think we can all sleep
a little easier tonight,

232
00:11:54,330 --> 00:11:57,080
knowing <i>they're</i> gonna sleep
a little easier tonight.

233
00:11:57,160 --> 00:12:01,870
And that would not be possible
without your generous, generous donations.

234
00:12:02,500 --> 00:12:04,040
Oh.

235
00:12:04,580 --> 00:12:06,160
Rudd Landy, my husband.

236
00:12:06,250 --> 00:12:08,580
- $10,000?
- Aw!

237
00:12:08,660 --> 00:12:10,330
My God.

238
00:12:10,410 --> 00:12:11,700
Honey, I love you.

239
00:12:14,450 --> 00:12:17,250
Well, that looks like
it's all of our donors for this evening,

240
00:12:17,330 --> 00:12:21,160
and I am so grateful
to each and every single one...

241
00:12:21,250 --> 00:12:23,080
I have a little video.

242
00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:24,000
Uh...

243
00:12:25,250 --> 00:12:28,830
Okay, I guess we have
a special video this evening.

244
00:12:29,500 --> 00:12:31,830
<i>Hey, Deirdre. It's Paris.</i>

245
00:12:31,910 --> 00:12:34,580
<i>When Josh told me about Mattress Miracles,</i>

246
00:12:34,660 --> 00:12:36,250
<i>I was obsessed.</i>

247
00:12:36,330 --> 00:12:39,870
<i>Anyone who knows me knows
there's nothing I'm more passionate about</i>

248
00:12:39,950 --> 00:12:42,750
<i>than solving
the homelessness crisis in America.</i>

249
00:12:42,830 --> 00:12:45,870
<i>That's why I'm donating
$100,000 to the cause.</i>

250
00:12:45,950 --> 00:12:48,040
- Oh my God!
- <i>Keep up the great work.</i>

251
00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:51,620
<i>-Love you, Josh.</i>
- Oh my goodness!

252
00:12:51,700 --> 00:12:53,450
- Josh, stand up.
- No.

253
00:12:53,540 --> 00:12:55,700
- Please. No, I insist.
- No, no, no.

254
00:12:59,160 --> 00:13:00,660
Okay!

255
00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:12,200
Why does he always have to outdo me?
What are you trying to prove, dude?

256
00:13:12,290 --> 00:13:15,580
And he lists his 19-million-dollar house,
doesn't even mention it to me?

257
00:13:15,660 --> 00:13:18,290
- Why don't you just tell him?
- I'm not gonna beg for his business.

258
00:13:18,370 --> 00:13:20,950
It's exactly what he wants.
All he ever does is fuck with me.

259
00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:23,250
"Hey, your face. What happened?"

260
00:13:23,330 --> 00:13:26,450
- "You gain weight? You look good though."
- You <i>do</i> look good.

261
00:13:26,540 --> 00:13:28,830
He meant it in a mean way.

262
00:13:28,910 --> 00:13:31,250
And he acts like
he's never heard of <i>NYC Hustlers</i>.

263
00:13:31,330 --> 00:13:34,580
You're friends with all these celebrities,
but you've never heard of Hayley Boyajian?

264
00:13:34,660 --> 00:13:35,700
Not buying it, bro.

265
00:13:35,790 --> 00:13:38,040
At some point,
giving that much money isn't helping.

266
00:13:38,120 --> 00:13:40,290
Think of all the tax issues
you have to untangle now.

267
00:13:40,370 --> 00:13:41,790
I'd hate to be in your shoes.

268
00:13:41,870 --> 00:13:43,370
Are we still talking about this?

269
00:13:43,450 --> 00:13:45,870
Nope. You're right. I'm done.

270
00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:50,660
Aw... Maxine.

271
00:13:50,750 --> 00:13:53,200
Aw... Who's a pretty girl?

272
00:13:53,290 --> 00:13:55,370
I thought we agreed
no more random disabled pets.

273
00:13:55,450 --> 00:13:57,080
Well, she was on a kill list.

274
00:13:57,160 --> 00:13:59,500
Besides, it's only temporary.
The adoption event is tomorrow.

275
00:13:59,580 --> 00:14:01,000
You're spreading yourself too thin.

276
00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:02,660
- Haven't you done enough?
- Not really.

277
00:14:02,750 --> 00:14:04,330
We have to put on all these lavish events

278
00:14:04,410 --> 00:14:06,540
to convince these rich assholes
to give us their money.

279
00:14:06,620 --> 00:14:10,000
But when I add up the costs, it feels like
we're barely making an impact.

280
00:14:10,080 --> 00:14:11,700
Hey! Knock it off!

281
00:14:11,790 --> 00:14:13,830
Gosh. You're scaring Maxine.

282
00:14:13,910 --> 00:14:16,540
- I told you not to text her.
- You weren't making a move, bro.

283
00:14:16,620 --> 00:14:18,080
What is going on with you two?

284
00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:20,410
Okay, this hot girl just transferred
from Lawrence, and--

285
00:14:20,500 --> 00:14:23,120
I met her first, and we were vibing.
Shane knew I was into her.

286
00:14:23,200 --> 00:14:26,200
The only reason she's talking to you
is to get to me, obviously.

287
00:14:26,290 --> 00:14:29,000
Isn't it possible
she likes Cory and not you?

288
00:14:29,080 --> 00:14:31,870
- Dad, Mom's having a stroke.
- Shane, your mother's not having a stroke.

289
00:14:31,950 --> 00:14:33,700
She just has a soft spot for underdogs.

290
00:14:33,790 --> 00:14:35,540
- Mm...
- Aw, underdogs.

291
00:14:35,620 --> 00:14:36,580
Enough.

292
00:14:36,660 --> 00:14:38,290
- Okay.
- Cory, come here.

293
00:14:38,370 --> 00:14:41,120
As you know, my brother bullied me
a lot too growing up.

294
00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:43,040
I used to bring girls home all the time.

295
00:14:43,120 --> 00:14:45,750
In the morning, I'd see them
tiptoeing out of Josh's bedroom

296
00:14:45,830 --> 00:14:47,250
after a night of expert lovemaking.

297
00:14:47,330 --> 00:14:48,750
I know. You talk about it a lot.

298
00:14:48,830 --> 00:14:52,620
Yeah, but did I let his antagonism
and innate sexual ability defeat me?

299
00:14:52,700 --> 00:14:55,830
No. I used it as fuel
to make myself bigger and stronger.

300
00:14:55,910 --> 00:14:58,910
You wanna punch above your weight,
gotta learn to push beyond your limits.

301
00:14:59,000 --> 00:14:59,830
Okay, pal?

302
00:14:59,910 --> 00:15:01,160
- Yeah.
- All right.

303
00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:04,450
Hmm. Hello?

304
00:15:04,540 --> 00:15:05,700
You should be thanking me.

305
00:15:05,790 --> 00:15:07,580
- This is he.
- I'm helping you out.

306
00:15:08,080 --> 00:15:10,200
- Oh my God. Is he okay?
- Sh! Sh!

307
00:15:10,290 --> 00:15:12,750
Of course. I'll be right over.

308
00:15:15,410 --> 00:15:18,200
That was the hospital.
My brother was in a car accident.

309
00:15:18,290 --> 00:15:19,870
<i>Paging Dr. Shaw.</i>

310
00:15:19,950 --> 00:15:22,410
It's okay. He's a fighter.
He's gonna pull through.

311
00:15:22,500 --> 00:15:24,580
- Are you Rudd Landy?
- That's me.

312
00:15:24,660 --> 00:15:26,250
- Is my brother okay?
- He will be.

313
00:15:26,330 --> 00:15:28,080
It was quite an accident.
He was very lucky.

314
00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:31,040
- Is he awake? Can we see him?
- He's sedated but should be up shortly.

315
00:15:31,120 --> 00:15:32,080
- Okay.
- Follow me.

316
00:15:35,450 --> 00:15:36,450
Who the fuck is this?

317
00:15:36,540 --> 00:15:38,540
- That's not his brother.
- Are you sure?

318
00:15:38,620 --> 00:15:41,660
I'm sorry. There must be a mistake.
We're looking for Josh Landy.

319
00:15:41,750 --> 00:15:44,040
Not Marcus Pinchel?

320
00:15:44,120 --> 00:15:45,370
Marcus who?

321
00:15:45,450 --> 00:15:49,750
It says right here,
"Please contact Rudd Landy, big brother."

322
00:15:50,870 --> 00:15:52,370
Uh...

323
00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:29,500
<i>- Just the two of us
- Just the two of us...</i>

324
00:16:29,580 --> 00:16:30,500
All right, Marcus.

325
00:16:30,580 --> 00:16:33,750
This game is called Horse,
so if you miss a shot, that's an H.

326
00:16:33,830 --> 00:16:35,750
- Got it?
- Yeah.

327
00:16:39,910 --> 00:16:41,040
Oh shit.

328
00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:45,620
That looked pretty painful.
Are you sure you're all right?

329
00:16:46,120 --> 00:16:47,660
No one's ever asked me that before.

330
00:16:48,290 --> 00:16:49,370
Hey, do me a favor.

331
00:16:49,450 --> 00:16:52,370
Don't tell anyone you got hurt with me,
or I could get in trouble.

332
00:16:52,450 --> 00:16:54,950
They won't notice. I get hurt a lot.

333
00:16:55,790 --> 00:16:58,580
- Do you want your hat back?
- No, I'm good. You can keep it.

334
00:16:59,660 --> 00:17:00,830
We're brothers now, right?

335
00:17:01,450 --> 00:17:02,750
Brothers for life?

336
00:17:02,830 --> 00:17:03,870
Brothers for life.

337
00:17:03,950 --> 00:17:06,080
<i>- We can make it if we try
- Ha-ha!</i>

338
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:07,910
Rudd.

339
00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:09,000
- Rudd!
- What?

340
00:17:09,080 --> 00:17:10,910
What is going on, and who is this person?

341
00:17:11,500 --> 00:17:13,620
I don't believe it,
but I think that's my Little Brother

342
00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:15,250
from a charity thing in high school.

343
00:17:15,330 --> 00:17:18,500
You were a Big Brother?
You never told me you did that.

344
00:17:18,580 --> 00:17:20,620
I thought it would look good
on a college application.

345
00:17:20,700 --> 00:17:22,120
I think we hung out five times.

346
00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:25,000
You obviously had a big effect on him
if he asked them to contact you.

347
00:17:25,080 --> 00:17:27,330
We barely know each other.
You don't think that's odd?

348
00:17:27,410 --> 00:17:29,950
- I haven't spoken to him in 30 years.
- Brother?

349
00:17:30,500 --> 00:17:31,620
Is that you?

350
00:17:31,700 --> 00:17:33,330
Say something.

351
00:17:33,410 --> 00:17:35,160
- What do you want me to say?
- Anything.

352
00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:41,000
Hey, bud. How you feeling?

353
00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:42,500
Is that really you,

354
00:17:42,580 --> 00:17:46,450
or are you an angel disguising itself
as the person I trusted the most

355
00:17:46,540 --> 00:17:48,500
in order to help me cross over?

356
00:17:48,580 --> 00:17:51,790
- I don't wanna die!
- No, no! Whoa! Hey, it's me! It's me!

357
00:17:51,870 --> 00:17:53,830
Oh, of course it is.

358
00:17:53,910 --> 00:17:55,950
And here I was wondering if you'd changed.

359
00:17:56,950 --> 00:18:00,290
So, uh... what have you been up to
all these years?

360
00:18:00,370 --> 00:18:01,200
Well, I...

361
00:18:01,290 --> 00:18:05,290
I've just got out of a long-term gig
and had some free time on my hands.

362
00:18:05,370 --> 00:18:09,700
So, naturally, I came to see big bro.
And to meet your lovely family.

363
00:18:09,790 --> 00:18:11,910
But this lovely I did not expect.

364
00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:13,500
She is beautiful.

365
00:18:13,580 --> 00:18:14,950
Out of your league, dawg.

366
00:18:15,040 --> 00:18:17,080
- Yeah.
- I mean, you fucked up.

367
00:18:17,580 --> 00:18:19,450
You didn't fuck down. You fucked up.

368
00:18:20,160 --> 00:18:22,830
- It's nice to finally meet you.
- You are one lucky lady.

369
00:18:22,910 --> 00:18:25,330
This man right here, absolute gem.

370
00:18:25,410 --> 00:18:28,290
This is the most generous, caring man
I've ever met.

371
00:18:28,370 --> 00:18:31,160
And even with
all those big-ass, rippling muscles,

372
00:18:31,250 --> 00:18:33,950
the strongest one is his heart.

373
00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:35,700
Oh my God. He is so sweet.

374
00:18:35,790 --> 00:18:37,540
There he is.

375
00:18:37,620 --> 00:18:40,160
Oh, full house.

376
00:18:40,250 --> 00:18:42,580
Don't mind me.
I just have to change his bag and bedpan.

377
00:18:42,660 --> 00:18:44,830
And let's get that catheter out.

378
00:18:44,910 --> 00:18:47,040
Thank you, Nurse Sonj.
You're too good to me.

379
00:18:47,120 --> 00:18:49,120
Oh, someone's been staying hydrated.

380
00:18:49,200 --> 00:18:50,870
- Guilty.
- Okay.

381
00:18:50,950 --> 00:18:53,750
Uh, Deirdre, don't we have to
pick the boys up, bring 'em to something?

382
00:18:53,830 --> 00:18:55,160
- Oh God. The boys!
- No.

383
00:18:55,250 --> 00:18:56,660
How are Shane and Cory?

384
00:18:57,160 --> 00:18:59,120
- You know their names?
- Are you kidding?

385
00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:01,410
Been dying to uncle-down
with those knuckleheads.

386
00:19:01,500 --> 00:19:02,330
Yeah.

387
00:19:02,410 --> 00:19:04,120
Too bad you're stuck here.

388
00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:06,450
Not for long.
He'll be discharged this afternoon.

389
00:19:06,540 --> 00:19:09,370
- The doctor said he had skull damage.
- Oh, that was there already.

390
00:19:09,450 --> 00:19:11,410
One of my foster dads
got ripped one night,

391
00:19:11,500 --> 00:19:14,250
put me in an old washing machine,
then rolled it down a hill.

392
00:19:14,330 --> 00:19:16,910
I got a huge dent up here.
It's like a cupholder.

393
00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:19,830
Oh my God. You have been through so much.

394
00:19:20,330 --> 00:19:23,250
Do you have somewhere you can stay
until you get back on your feet?

395
00:19:23,330 --> 00:19:25,250
Not really, but when you're a foster kid,

396
00:19:25,330 --> 00:19:27,830
you get used to making a home
out of wherever you can find it.

397
00:19:27,910 --> 00:19:30,080
But you're not a foster kid.
You're like 40.

398
00:19:30,660 --> 00:19:32,450
Maybe you can stay with us
for a night or two.

399
00:19:32,540 --> 00:19:34,660
- That's a fantastic idea.
- Mm-hmm.

400
00:19:34,750 --> 00:19:36,830
- Could you give us a minute, please?
- Sure.

401
00:19:38,120 --> 00:19:39,500
I love their energy.

402
00:19:39,580 --> 00:19:42,330
What are you doing? That's not
a puppy from a kill shelter, okay?

403
00:19:42,410 --> 00:19:44,700
He obviously doesn't have
anyone else to turn to.

404
00:19:44,790 --> 00:19:47,830
- He drove all the way here to see you.
- That's not a red flag for you?

405
00:19:47,910 --> 00:19:50,660
What are we supposed to do?
He's got nowhere else to go.

406
00:19:50,750 --> 00:19:54,540
Before we know it, he'll be renting out
each of his holes to afford a motel room.

407
00:19:54,620 --> 00:19:56,500
I hear you,
but the timing couldn't be worse.

408
00:19:56,580 --> 00:19:57,910
I start shooting tomorrow.

409
00:19:58,000 --> 00:20:00,370
Come on. It's only for one night.

410
00:20:00,950 --> 00:20:02,450
- Good Lord.
- One night.

411
00:20:02,540 --> 00:20:05,000
Take a deep breath.

412
00:20:05,500 --> 00:20:06,500
Oh shit!

413
00:20:06,580 --> 00:20:07,540
Thank God.

414
00:20:07,620 --> 00:20:10,750
- Ugh!
- That is a wrap on Catheter Zeta-Jones.

415
00:20:10,830 --> 00:20:12,080
Phew!

416
00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:14,080
That actually cleared my sinuses.

417
00:20:15,580 --> 00:20:17,830
Don't worry.
You won't have to mess with all this.

418
00:20:17,910 --> 00:20:21,330
Although, he may need to use a bedpan
for a few days, until his bowels solidify.

419
00:20:21,410 --> 00:20:22,290
- Perfect.
- Right.

420
00:20:22,370 --> 00:20:26,000
- I have a few questions about his care.
- Oh, sure. I'll see you, guys.

421
00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:27,120
Yeah.

422
00:20:27,200 --> 00:20:31,080
Nurse Sonj is the best, isn't she?
Between us, I think she wants to hit this.

423
00:20:31,160 --> 00:20:34,290
- Good for you, bud.
- Whoo! Tap this ass like a double IPA.

424
00:20:34,370 --> 00:20:35,950
I heard you the first time.

425
00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:38,000
- I'll let you know if it happens.
- Not necessary.

426
00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:39,830
Oh, I know, but I got you.

427
00:20:39,910 --> 00:20:40,910
Bro code.

428
00:20:44,370 --> 00:20:47,410
Man, I can't believe
getting my shit rocked

429
00:20:47,500 --> 00:20:50,250
by a dump truck ended up being
the greatest thing that happened to me.

430
00:20:50,330 --> 00:20:51,830
Aw. We are happy to help.

431
00:20:51,910 --> 00:20:53,120
Aren't we, Rudd?

432
00:20:53,830 --> 00:20:57,330
Hold up. This is your ride?
I've never been in one of these before.

433
00:20:57,410 --> 00:20:58,330
Don't touch the glass.

434
00:20:58,410 --> 00:21:00,200
- Oh.
- Matter of fact, don't touch anything.

435
00:21:00,290 --> 00:21:02,330
I bought this
with my first big commission check.

436
00:21:02,410 --> 00:21:06,620
- So it's more than just a car to me.
- Understood. Let me create some distance.

437
00:21:07,700 --> 00:21:10,160
- No! Hey! What the... Hey!
- Oh no. Sorry about that. Let me just...

438
00:21:10,250 --> 00:21:11,410
Oh!

439
00:21:13,450 --> 00:21:14,540
I got a friend at AutoZone.

440
00:21:14,620 --> 00:21:16,080
- He'll buff it right out.
- It's okay.

441
00:21:18,500 --> 00:21:20,950
No way. This is your neighborhood?

442
00:21:21,450 --> 00:21:24,870
What? Are you shitting me?
Dude, this is your house?

443
00:21:24,950 --> 00:21:26,910
Rudd found it before it was even listed.

444
00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:29,330
Of course he did. He's a realtor.

445
00:21:29,410 --> 00:21:31,200
The most pimp job there is.

446
00:21:31,290 --> 00:21:33,790
Bus bench ads. Open houses.

447
00:21:33,870 --> 00:21:36,250
Plowing "For Sale" signs into the lawn

448
00:21:36,330 --> 00:21:39,040
with those ballistic missiles
you call arms.

449
00:21:39,120 --> 00:21:42,200
I am so damn proud of you, dude. Ah!

450
00:21:42,290 --> 00:21:46,160
Hey, you think you could teach me?
I wanna learn from you, <i>senpai.</i>

451
00:21:46,250 --> 00:21:49,290
It's not that easy.
It took me years just to pass the exam.

452
00:21:49,370 --> 00:21:52,450
You don't have to do a thing.
Just let me watch and absorb.

453
00:21:52,540 --> 00:21:54,160
- I'm an active learner.
- Yeah.

454
00:21:54,250 --> 00:21:55,750
You could teach him a thing or two.

455
00:21:58,040 --> 00:22:00,250
You know what, D?
I got Marcus. Why don't you go on in?

456
00:22:00,750 --> 00:22:01,580
Okay.

457
00:22:05,870 --> 00:22:10,120
Time to learn real estate
from the master. Limbo!

458
00:22:14,120 --> 00:22:14,950
Ouch.

459
00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:16,910
Hurt a little bit.

460
00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:19,200
Beautiful rakes.

461
00:22:20,330 --> 00:22:21,160
Rudd?

462
00:22:22,660 --> 00:22:23,700
You there?

463
00:22:23,790 --> 00:22:24,660
Oh.

464
00:22:31,910 --> 00:22:33,160
Why'd you come here?

465
00:22:33,250 --> 00:22:34,330
What do you mean?

466
00:22:34,410 --> 00:22:36,660
You expect me to believe
you had no one else to call?

467
00:22:36,750 --> 00:22:39,660
What is this, some straight money grab?
If so, name your price.

468
00:22:39,750 --> 00:22:40,790
For what?

469
00:22:40,870 --> 00:22:43,540
For you to jump directly into an Uber
and not come inside.

470
00:22:43,620 --> 00:22:46,000
You can't honestly think
we're brothers, right?

471
00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:47,160
What about our emails?

472
00:22:47,250 --> 00:22:49,700
- What emails?
- Okay, now I know you're fucking with me.

473
00:22:49,790 --> 00:22:51,200
- Listen to me.
- Ah!

474
00:22:51,290 --> 00:22:52,750
- You're gonna go inside, okay?
- Yeah.

475
00:22:52,830 --> 00:22:55,080
You're gonna say,
"Thank you. No, thank you."

476
00:22:55,580 --> 00:22:58,000
You remembered you have to
spend time with your actual family

477
00:22:58,080 --> 00:22:59,540
instead of your pretend one.

478
00:23:00,120 --> 00:23:01,660
Shane! Cory!

479
00:23:01,750 --> 00:23:04,000
There's someone we'd like you to meet.

480
00:23:04,080 --> 00:23:06,370
This is your dad's Little Brother, Marcus.

481
00:23:06,450 --> 00:23:09,290
The boys. Get in here, you two.

482
00:23:09,370 --> 00:23:10,290
Come on.

483
00:23:15,950 --> 00:23:17,790
- Okay.
- Uh, who is this guy?

484
00:23:17,870 --> 00:23:19,660
I'm so confused.

485
00:23:19,750 --> 00:23:21,500
Yeah, I didn't know
you had a little brother.

486
00:23:21,580 --> 00:23:24,160
That term is being used rather loosely,
but that's okay.

487
00:23:24,250 --> 00:23:25,660
How long is he in town for?

488
00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:31,200
Well, actually, I think I better head out.

489
00:23:31,290 --> 00:23:33,580
Wow. Already? You just got here.

490
00:23:33,660 --> 00:23:36,080
I thought you said
you had nowhere else to go.

491
00:23:36,700 --> 00:23:37,700
You're right.

492
00:23:37,790 --> 00:23:39,870
I did say that.

493
00:23:39,950 --> 00:23:41,910
Then I realized
I should be with my real family

494
00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:43,700
instead of my pretend one.

495
00:23:44,410 --> 00:23:47,330
Did Rudd tell you to say that?
How much did he offer you?

496
00:23:47,950 --> 00:23:50,120
To be fair,
we never quite landed on a number.

497
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:51,450
Yeah, just ignore him.

498
00:23:51,540 --> 00:23:54,700
He's got a lot on his plate right now.
It has nothing to do with you.

499
00:23:54,790 --> 00:23:56,700
You know, I was sensing
a little bit of that.

500
00:23:56,790 --> 00:24:00,370
Boys, grab some spare bedsheets
and a pillow for your uncle Marcus.

501
00:24:00,450 --> 00:24:02,830
Oh my God. I'm Uncle Marcus!

502
00:24:03,950 --> 00:24:07,080
Hey. We are gonna get to the bottom
of whatever's bothering you, bro.

503
00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:11,160
I'm starting to think it's no accident
that I showed up when I did.

504
00:24:11,250 --> 00:24:13,950
Ow!

505
00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:16,200
Uh...

506
00:24:16,290 --> 00:24:18,750
That's my boot you're feeling.
I'm not erect.

507
00:24:18,830 --> 00:24:20,500
Why is this thing so slippery?

508
00:24:20,580 --> 00:24:23,950
Oh, I told Nurse Sonj to go heavy
on the Vaseline for my wounds,

509
00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:25,330
and it got all over the place.

510
00:24:25,410 --> 00:24:26,450
Whoa!

511
00:24:28,500 --> 00:24:30,120
Whoa! Oh shit!

512
00:24:32,330 --> 00:24:33,410
Ow.

513
00:24:33,500 --> 00:24:35,450
We just had to let him
stay in <i>my</i> office.

514
00:24:35,540 --> 00:24:38,830
You couldn't even get him up the stairs.
He'll be safer down there anyway.

515
00:24:38,910 --> 00:24:39,870
Oh, will he?

516
00:24:39,950 --> 00:24:41,290
What happened to the guy I married

517
00:24:41,370 --> 00:24:43,410
who said "the only thing
that matters is family"?

518
00:24:43,500 --> 00:24:46,660
Yeah, family I'm related to.
He's not my actual brother.

519
00:24:46,750 --> 00:24:47,750
Why are you so upset?

520
00:24:47,830 --> 00:24:49,660
Maybe he came back into your life
for a reason.

521
00:24:49,750 --> 00:24:50,790
Or maybe I'm upset

522
00:24:50,870 --> 00:24:53,000
'cause there's a stranger
sleeping in our house.

523
00:24:53,080 --> 00:24:56,250
And when I was carrying him up the stairs,
he said he wasn't erect.

524
00:24:56,330 --> 00:24:59,620
- But he definitely was.
- Well, he's staying. Deal with it.

525
00:24:59,700 --> 00:25:01,080
I can't afford to deal with it.

526
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:03,830
I have to be on camera tomorrow,
and now I'm all stressed out.

527
00:25:03,910 --> 00:25:06,080
- You were already stressed out.
- You think?

528
00:25:06,160 --> 00:25:08,200
I mean, it's only my entire reputation

529
00:25:08,290 --> 00:25:10,450
and everything I've ever worked for
on the line.

530
00:25:10,540 --> 00:25:11,410
Whatever.

531
00:25:12,870 --> 00:25:16,580
Okay, maybe this Marcus stuff
is just dredging up some old feelings.

532
00:25:16,660 --> 00:25:18,750
Like whatever's going on
between you and Josh.

533
00:25:18,830 --> 00:25:20,160
I'm turning on red mode, Deirdre.

534
00:25:20,250 --> 00:25:21,410
Good night.

535
00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:42,370
<i>Rudd and Deirdre,</i>

536
00:25:43,370 --> 00:25:45,950
<i>today is the beginning
of a beautiful journey.</i>

537
00:25:46,870 --> 00:25:49,290
<i>You've found in each other not only love,</i>

538
00:25:49,370 --> 00:25:52,910
<i>but trust, respect and joy.</i>

539
00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:55,160
<i>As you step into
this new chapter together,</i>

540
00:25:55,790 --> 00:25:59,750
<i>may your days be filled with laughter,
your hearts with kindness...</i>

541
00:25:59,830 --> 00:26:01,910
Hey. Sorry.

542
00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,790
- Am I being too loud?
- No, you're fine. You're fine.

543
00:26:04,870 --> 00:26:07,700
- <i>It is my absolute honor...</i>
- You're watching our wedding video.

544
00:26:07,790 --> 00:26:11,000
Yeah, I couldn't sleep.
I hope I'm not overstepping.

545
00:26:11,080 --> 00:26:13,450
I haven't seen this in years.

546
00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:17,330
Look at my hair.

547
00:26:17,410 --> 00:26:18,620
Oh, it's beautiful.

548
00:26:18,700 --> 00:26:21,000
The whole thing is so fucking beautiful.

549
00:26:21,080 --> 00:26:22,750
It was a killer wedding.

550
00:26:22,830 --> 00:26:24,950
No, it's more than that. It's your love.

551
00:26:25,040 --> 00:26:27,500
It's infectious.
You can see it on everyone's face.

552
00:26:28,330 --> 00:26:31,790
You guys found it,
the thing we're all looking for.

553
00:26:32,910 --> 00:26:34,370
We were so happy then.

554
00:26:34,870 --> 00:26:38,750
Uh-oh. I'm picking up on a past tense.

555
00:26:40,120 --> 00:26:41,660
Now I'm feeling tense.

556
00:26:42,160 --> 00:26:44,750
- Everything okay with you two?
- Oh.

557
00:26:44,830 --> 00:26:48,370
It's... It is late.
You do not wanna hear about this.

558
00:26:48,450 --> 00:26:50,290
Yeah, you're right.
I don't wanna hear about it.

559
00:26:50,370 --> 00:26:52,540
I <i>need</i> to hear about it.

560
00:26:52,620 --> 00:26:55,790
Come on, girl. This is a safe space.

561
00:26:56,950 --> 00:26:58,290
I don't know.

562
00:26:58,790 --> 00:27:01,750
You know, Rudd's just...

563
00:27:02,250 --> 00:27:04,750
He's so focused on this reality show
that he's doing.

564
00:27:04,830 --> 00:27:06,870
- It's all that he ever talks about.
- Uh-huh.

565
00:27:06,950 --> 00:27:09,870
I think growing up in his brother's shadow
really did a number on him.

566
00:27:09,950 --> 00:27:12,660
I see. Complicated dynamic there.

567
00:27:12,750 --> 00:27:14,450
Mm! Yeah, I just...

568
00:27:15,870 --> 00:27:17,870
I want my husband back.

569
00:27:17,950 --> 00:27:20,120
Yeah. And let me guess.

570
00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:23,660
It's been a minute since you and Rudd
have taken a trip down to the boneyard.

571
00:27:23,750 --> 00:27:24,830
Oh.

572
00:27:25,370 --> 00:27:27,080
What makes you say that?

573
00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:28,450
In my experience,

574
00:27:28,540 --> 00:27:31,660
nothing kills a man's libido faster
than feelings of insecurity.

575
00:27:32,910 --> 00:27:33,830
Okay.

576
00:27:34,660 --> 00:27:36,450
I guess it has been a while.

577
00:27:36,950 --> 00:27:39,910
But it's not all his fault.
I have been busy too.

578
00:27:40,000 --> 00:27:41,580
Sure.

579
00:27:41,660 --> 00:27:44,750
But is it possible
that Rudd being so distracted

580
00:27:44,830 --> 00:27:47,830
has left a void that you're trying to fill
with your own projects?

581
00:27:47,910 --> 00:27:51,160
Dedicating yourself to being in service
of everyone but yourself?

582
00:27:52,910 --> 00:27:55,040
I never thought about it that way.

583
00:27:56,790 --> 00:27:58,870
You seem to know a lot about this stuff.

584
00:27:59,620 --> 00:28:01,750
Yeah. Well, the, uh...

585
00:28:01,830 --> 00:28:04,000
...apartment complex
I was living in before this

586
00:28:04,080 --> 00:28:05,620
happened to have a lot of therapists.

587
00:28:05,700 --> 00:28:06,620
Ah.

588
00:28:06,700 --> 00:28:09,000
And when they get home from work,
HIPAA be damned.

589
00:28:10,370 --> 00:28:14,950
But I'm just glad I got here when I did.
Our man is hurting right now.

590
00:28:15,040 --> 00:28:17,660
He feels like he has to pretend
to be something he's not

591
00:28:17,750 --> 00:28:19,040
just to be worthy of our love.

592
00:28:19,120 --> 00:28:21,330
Yeah, he does seem to be in a lot of pain.

593
00:28:21,410 --> 00:28:23,330
I'm gonna get the old Rudd back

594
00:28:23,410 --> 00:28:27,410
and reignite that beautiful spark
if it's the last thing I do, honey.

595
00:28:28,750 --> 00:28:31,660
Now... ...I hope you do not mind.

596
00:28:32,160 --> 00:28:36,250
I looked in the fridge earlier,
and I saw a heavenly white.

597
00:28:36,330 --> 00:28:37,870
- Oh.
- Not unlike yourself.

598
00:28:37,950 --> 00:28:40,080
- Oh.
- Madame?

599
00:28:41,040 --> 00:28:42,410
Yes, please.

600
00:28:42,500 --> 00:28:43,660
As you wish.

601
00:28:47,120 --> 00:28:48,620
- Cheers.
- Cheers.

602
00:28:53,290 --> 00:28:55,910
Mm. This pumpkin quiche is next-level.

603
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:59,620
Thanks, Cory. It's actually
my third foster dad's recipe.

604
00:28:59,700 --> 00:29:03,410
It's all I have to remember him by
after he died on 9/11

605
00:29:03,500 --> 00:29:05,250
in an unrelated casino fire.

606
00:29:06,660 --> 00:29:08,580
Okay, we gotta go, dipshit.

607
00:29:10,540 --> 00:29:12,450
- Morning, bro.
- Yeah, morning.

608
00:29:12,540 --> 00:29:15,080
I see you helped yourself to my clothes.

609
00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:18,870
Uh, is that okay? You have my word.
I will wash them before I leave.

610
00:29:18,950 --> 00:29:20,200
Oh, that's not necessary.

611
00:29:20,290 --> 00:29:21,950
Oh no, 1,000 percent is.

612
00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:26,410
I have a medical condition
where my sweat smells like cat piss.

613
00:29:26,500 --> 00:29:30,620
- You know what? You can keep 'em.
- Thank you, cutie. Go off, queen.

614
00:29:30,700 --> 00:29:32,870
- See you boys later.
- Hey, where are you going?

615
00:29:32,950 --> 00:29:33,870
The adoption event.

616
00:29:33,950 --> 00:29:36,040
I told you about it yesterday.
It's on the calendar.

617
00:29:36,120 --> 00:29:38,120
No. What about him?
This is my first day of shooting.

618
00:29:38,200 --> 00:29:41,410
Well, Marcus actually had
a <i>really</i> good idea.

619
00:29:41,500 --> 00:29:44,540
I just figured, since you said
you'd teach me real estate,

620
00:29:44,620 --> 00:29:45,910
I could shadow you today.

621
00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:47,000
No.

622
00:29:47,080 --> 00:29:49,160
No, no, no, no. Absolutely not.

623
00:29:49,250 --> 00:29:52,250
- You're worried I'll get in the way.
- That's one of my many concerns, yeah.

624
00:29:52,330 --> 00:29:55,250
All right, I gotta go.
You guys figure it out. Break a leg.

625
00:29:55,330 --> 00:29:57,450
Nothing to figure out. He's not coming.

626
00:29:57,540 --> 00:29:59,540
If you really don't want me there,
I respect that.

627
00:29:59,620 --> 00:30:02,580
- The last thing I wanna be is a burden.
- So nice of you to understand that.

628
00:30:02,660 --> 00:30:04,790
Yeah, I can just kick it around here.
Not a problem.

629
00:30:04,870 --> 00:30:07,410
I'm sure I can find something to get into.

630
00:30:08,040 --> 00:30:10,620
Oh shit! I left my quiche in the oven.

631
00:30:10,700 --> 00:30:12,500
Goddamn it! Oh!

632
00:30:13,540 --> 00:30:15,830
Fire in the hole!

633
00:30:15,910 --> 00:30:18,540
Whoa!

634
00:30:19,660 --> 00:30:21,000
Suck it, bitch!

635
00:30:21,080 --> 00:30:22,000
Whoo!

636
00:30:22,080 --> 00:30:24,000
Almost burned the entire house down.

637
00:30:25,120 --> 00:30:26,080
Could you imagine?

638
00:30:29,540 --> 00:30:31,830
The Big fucking Apple, dawg!

639
00:30:31,910 --> 00:30:34,080
What up, New York City?!

640
00:30:34,160 --> 00:30:36,830
Whoo!

641
00:30:36,910 --> 00:30:38,540
Yeah!

642
00:30:38,620 --> 00:30:39,870
Christ. Get in here!

643
00:30:39,950 --> 00:30:41,700
Holy shit, dude.

644
00:30:41,790 --> 00:30:44,950
- Is this really my life?
- I was wondering the same thing.

645
00:30:45,040 --> 00:30:47,540
Hey! We're near my old neighborhood, bro.

646
00:30:48,040 --> 00:30:51,200
We should swing by the basketball court.
You still owe me a rematch.

647
00:30:51,290 --> 00:30:54,910
- I have no idea what you're talking about.
- Don't pretend you forgot, bitch.

648
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:56,750
Ow! I'm driving a car!

649
00:30:59,080 --> 00:31:00,700
Hey, I owe you an apology.

650
00:31:00,790 --> 00:31:02,950
I've just been so focused
on my own mental health,

651
00:31:03,040 --> 00:31:04,540
I took my mind off of your needs.

652
00:31:04,620 --> 00:31:06,910
Has something happened recently
that triggered some stress?

653
00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:08,250
Yeah, this.

654
00:31:08,330 --> 00:31:10,660
- You.
- Yeah, but it's more than that, isn't it?

655
00:31:10,750 --> 00:31:13,790
I got the sense from Deirdre
you've been a little distracted lately.

656
00:31:14,290 --> 00:31:15,830
- She told you that?
- No.

657
00:31:15,910 --> 00:31:18,450
She confided in me
because she cares about you.

658
00:31:18,540 --> 00:31:19,370
What'd she say?

659
00:31:19,450 --> 00:31:23,120
She implied you guys might be having
some problems in the sack.

660
00:31:24,040 --> 00:31:25,040
Hey, I get it.

661
00:31:25,120 --> 00:31:28,540
If I had as much going on in my life
as you do, I'd be gummy-worming too.

662
00:31:28,620 --> 00:31:30,580
- Pew.
- Nobody's gummy-worming, all right?

663
00:31:30,660 --> 00:31:32,830
Whatever the problem is,
I promise, it's in your head.

664
00:31:32,910 --> 00:31:34,910
Your penis is probably
a totally normal size

665
00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:37,450
and it just looks tiny
next to your massive body.

666
00:31:37,540 --> 00:31:40,910
You know, even if I was too distracted
to have sex with my wife, which I'm not,

667
00:31:41,500 --> 00:31:42,700
but if I was, it's just...

668
00:31:42,790 --> 00:31:45,330
...'cause I want Deirdre
to have the best life possible.

669
00:31:45,410 --> 00:31:46,950
To do that, I gotta work twice as hard.

670
00:31:47,040 --> 00:31:49,540
Rudd, I love you,
but you're a freaking dumbass.

671
00:31:49,620 --> 00:31:52,120
Deirdre doesn't care
about that materialistic shit.

672
00:31:52,200 --> 00:31:56,200
You need to stop being so hard on yourself
and start getting hard for your wife.

673
00:31:56,290 --> 00:31:58,200
Just set aside some time for a date night

674
00:31:58,290 --> 00:32:00,700
and book her on the first flight
to Poundtown.

675
00:32:00,790 --> 00:32:02,870
Take a cab to Boneville.

676
00:32:02,950 --> 00:32:05,620
Or a rickshaw to Sexburg.

677
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:09,790
Ah-ha! There he is.
There's the Rudd I remember.

678
00:32:10,290 --> 00:32:12,910
I really appreciate
you opening up to me like that.

679
00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:15,290
I'm not opening up.
That is not what's happening here.

680
00:32:15,370 --> 00:32:16,200
Joshy!

681
00:32:16,290 --> 00:32:18,700
Dude, he's gonna be so surprised I'm here!

682
00:32:18,790 --> 00:32:21,790
- No, we don't... Fuck.
- Bro, what up?

683
00:32:24,000 --> 00:32:26,910
- Rudd?
- Hey, Josh. So that is Marcus.

684
00:32:27,000 --> 00:32:30,080
He's my Little Brother
from a charity thing I did in high school.

685
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:31,950
And he is here for some reason.

686
00:32:32,040 --> 00:32:34,540
Right. Okay. Uh, just calling to check in.

687
00:32:34,620 --> 00:32:36,660
<i>You seemed a little off the other night.</i>

688
00:32:36,750 --> 00:32:38,830
I know you're under pressure
with this show and all,

689
00:32:38,910 --> 00:32:41,950
but taking care of your mental health
is really important, okay?

690
00:32:42,450 --> 00:32:45,080
You're getting to be that age
where some guys snap

691
00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:47,830
and annihilate their whole family
or whatever.

692
00:32:47,910 --> 00:32:50,830
You know what? Maybe I can get you
a session with my life coach.

693
00:32:50,910 --> 00:32:52,120
Well, ex-life coach.

694
00:32:52,200 --> 00:32:55,080
I'm basically coaching him now,
and it's been amazing.

695
00:32:55,160 --> 00:32:57,620
Hey, hey. Josh, Josh.
You know what? I'm fine. Okay?

696
00:32:57,700 --> 00:33:00,410
Honestly, all good over here.
You have no idea how good I'm doing.

697
00:33:00,500 --> 00:33:02,910
I'm actually on my way
to go shoot my big reality show.

698
00:33:03,000 --> 00:33:05,540
So everything's fine. Okay, bye.

699
00:33:15,660 --> 00:33:17,750
Ooh-hoo! Here we go.

700
00:33:21,910 --> 00:33:24,040
Hey. Don't worry.

701
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:26,910
The camera's gonna love you
almost as much as I do.

702
00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:28,950
- Huh?
- Yeah, thanks. Just stay here, okay?

703
00:33:29,040 --> 00:33:30,410
- In the car?
- Yeah.

704
00:33:30,500 --> 00:33:33,040
- Is that even safe in this heat?
- I'll crack a window.

705
00:33:33,750 --> 00:33:35,200
Wh... what if there's an emergency?

706
00:33:35,290 --> 00:33:37,040
No matter what, do not leave this vehicle

707
00:33:37,120 --> 00:33:38,910
or touch anything
inside this vehicle, okay?

708
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:40,500
Or I'll break your other leg.

709
00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:42,120
Ouch.

710
00:33:42,910 --> 00:33:45,040
Happy shoot day. You ready?

711
00:33:45,120 --> 00:33:47,830
- We need to talk.
- Uh-oh.

712
00:33:47,910 --> 00:33:48,750
Am I in trouble?

713
00:33:48,830 --> 00:33:49,870
Remember, a few years back,

714
00:33:49,950 --> 00:33:52,250
my Little Brother from that charity
emailed out of the blue.

715
00:33:52,330 --> 00:33:54,160
- And I told you to handle it?
- Yeah.

716
00:33:54,250 --> 00:33:56,540
You sent him the response
we send to all the wackos, right?

717
00:33:56,620 --> 00:33:57,660
I did.

718
00:33:58,330 --> 00:34:00,200
But then he wrote us back.

719
00:34:00,290 --> 00:34:02,410
You followed protocol
and deleted it, right?

720
00:34:04,450 --> 00:34:05,290
It was too sad.

721
00:34:05,370 --> 00:34:08,250
He was all alone, and it seemed like
you two were really close,

722
00:34:08,330 --> 00:34:11,450
so I wrote him back... as you.

723
00:34:11,540 --> 00:34:13,370
- Mia, you realize what you've done?
- I'm sorry.

724
00:34:13,450 --> 00:34:14,450
You were really busy,

725
00:34:14,540 --> 00:34:16,910
and I knew you wouldn't wanna
turn your back on him.

726
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:19,200
- It seemed like he really needed you.
- Oh Jesus.

727
00:34:19,290 --> 00:34:22,160
He was going through a lot.
At the time, I was going through a lot.

728
00:34:22,250 --> 00:34:25,080
Remember my dad left my mom
for the guy in his Pilates class?

729
00:34:25,160 --> 00:34:28,580
I couldn't sleep for weeks,
and Marcus was there for me.

730
00:34:28,660 --> 00:34:31,750
- He's a really good listener.
- No wonder he thinks we're so close. Fuck!

731
00:34:31,830 --> 00:34:34,450
I didn't tell you 'cause I didn't want it
to interfere with the show.

732
00:34:34,540 --> 00:34:37,160
A little late for that.
He's in my fucking car as we speak.

733
00:34:37,250 --> 00:34:38,870
And I can't fucking get rid of him!

734
00:34:57,660 --> 00:34:59,540
What's up? I'm Kieran.

735
00:34:59,620 --> 00:35:02,200
Oh, hey. Rudd. Honored to meet you.
Big fan of your work.

736
00:35:02,290 --> 00:35:05,080
Aw, thanks, man. I'm excited for you.

737
00:35:05,160 --> 00:35:06,540
Big audition.

738
00:35:07,040 --> 00:35:10,200
Oh. No, I've actually been added
to the main cast already.

739
00:35:10,290 --> 00:35:11,540
Is that what they told you?

740
00:35:12,370 --> 00:35:14,660
Let me guess.
They shot a title sequence for you?

741
00:35:14,750 --> 00:35:16,000
Yeah.

742
00:35:16,080 --> 00:35:19,200
Man, if I had a dollar
for every godforsaken soul

743
00:35:19,290 --> 00:35:21,370
that shot a title sequence
that never made it to air

744
00:35:21,450 --> 00:35:23,080
because they crapped out on day one,

745
00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:25,370
I could make an all-cash offer
on this brownstone.

746
00:35:25,450 --> 00:35:27,500
- Did you pick an angle at least?
- Angle?

747
00:35:27,580 --> 00:35:30,160
Um, Lenore said she liked
the big dog edit for me.

748
00:35:31,330 --> 00:35:33,830
Unfortunately, we already have a big dog.
That's Hayley.

749
00:35:33,910 --> 00:35:36,620
Oh, you could go with mysterious outsider

750
00:35:36,700 --> 00:35:38,910
who nobody knows which side they're on.

751
00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:41,620
That spot's been open
since Chase Greer had a mini stroke

752
00:35:41,700 --> 00:35:43,790
and then a regular stroke and then OD'd.

753
00:35:47,870 --> 00:35:49,290
Why did I drink so much coffee?

754
00:35:49,370 --> 00:35:51,830
Hoo! I gotta piss.

755
00:35:52,910 --> 00:35:54,120
It's already going away.

756
00:35:56,000 --> 00:35:57,160
Now it's back.

757
00:35:57,250 --> 00:35:59,410
Okay, everyone.

758
00:35:59,500 --> 00:36:01,120
Okay, so we're gonna start with the scene

759
00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:03,500
where Rudd and Kieran
are competing for this listing.

760
00:36:03,580 --> 00:36:05,620
- All right? Bunch of stars.
- Right. We're doing it--

761
00:36:05,700 --> 00:36:07,620
Excuse me. Um...
I just wanted to ask you guys.

762
00:36:07,700 --> 00:36:10,450
What about a catchphrase,
if I'm lucky enough to close the deal?

763
00:36:10,540 --> 00:36:11,660
I was thinking,

764
00:36:12,250 --> 00:36:13,450
"Mansion accomplished."

765
00:36:13,540 --> 00:36:16,450
"Manson accomplished." Why would you
reference Charles Manson?

766
00:36:16,540 --> 00:36:20,330
No. "Mansion accomplished."
It's usually like "mission accomplished."

767
00:36:20,410 --> 00:36:23,290
- Oh. Oh my God. That's way worse.
- Yeah.

768
00:36:23,370 --> 00:36:25,950
- I think... holster it.
- Let's just hold off on that for now.

769
00:36:26,040 --> 00:36:27,370
- Okay.
- Just for now.

770
00:36:27,450 --> 00:36:28,750
Cool, cool. No problem. Uh--

771
00:36:28,830 --> 00:36:30,370
- Let's try one, shall we?
- Rock and roll.

772
00:36:30,450 --> 00:36:32,660
All right, people. We're making TV magic.

773
00:36:32,750 --> 00:36:33,750
Ready to roll.

774
00:36:33,830 --> 00:36:36,000
Trust me.

775
00:36:36,080 --> 00:36:37,950
The mysterious outsider's the way to go.

776
00:36:38,040 --> 00:36:40,910
- Go for that in the first take?
- It might be the only take you get, man.

777
00:36:41,000 --> 00:36:42,500
And action.

778
00:36:43,080 --> 00:36:43,950
Hey there.

779
00:36:44,040 --> 00:36:46,580
- I'm Kieran from--
- Oh, I know who you are.

780
00:36:46,660 --> 00:36:47,500
Big fan.

781
00:36:47,580 --> 00:36:49,040
Greetings.

782
00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:51,450
Rudd Landy. Big City Realty.

783
00:36:51,540 --> 00:36:55,250
You may not be familiar with me.
That's because I operate in the shadows.

784
00:36:56,250 --> 00:36:57,500
What the fuck?

785
00:36:57,580 --> 00:36:59,040
Life is weird.

786
00:36:59,750 --> 00:37:01,790
I used to pass by this house every day

787
00:37:01,870 --> 00:37:03,950
when I would take my dad
to his chemo treatments.

788
00:37:04,040 --> 00:37:07,250
Just the thought of getting to sell this
one day helped me get through it.

789
00:37:07,330 --> 00:37:09,580
I'm so inspired by the architecture.

790
00:37:09,660 --> 00:37:11,750
I never share information about my family.

791
00:37:11,830 --> 00:37:13,450
Okay. Let's cut there.

792
00:37:13,540 --> 00:37:16,250
- W... what's up? Was that okay?
- Well, it was...

793
00:37:16,330 --> 00:37:18,750
Huh. Well, we love that you tried that.

794
00:37:18,830 --> 00:37:20,500
And it was definitely something.

795
00:37:20,580 --> 00:37:22,660
Let's do one
where you don't try something.

796
00:37:23,500 --> 00:37:25,870
Now it's coming like a wave.

797
00:37:27,080 --> 00:37:29,660
Don't do it, Marcus. You know the rules.

798
00:37:29,750 --> 00:37:32,120
Don't touch anything.
Don't get out of the car.

799
00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:34,000
Is there a cup in here or something?

800
00:37:34,080 --> 00:37:36,790
Big Gulp cup. Everyone has
a Big Gulp cup in their car.

801
00:37:38,660 --> 00:37:39,750
Fuck!

802
00:37:42,870 --> 00:37:44,830
Aha.

803
00:37:44,910 --> 00:37:48,450
It really was such a blessing
to see this beautiful piece of property.

804
00:37:48,540 --> 00:37:51,910
Yeah. It really is a masterwork
in both design and construction.

805
00:37:52,410 --> 00:37:55,290
That's something I know a lot about. Here.

806
00:37:56,330 --> 00:37:58,160
See my Porsche 911 out there?

807
00:37:58,250 --> 00:37:59,790
It's more than just a car to me.

808
00:38:00,290 --> 00:38:02,750
And I know this place
is more than just a house to you.

809
00:38:03,250 --> 00:38:05,830
All right. This is just
crazy enough to work.

810
00:38:05,910 --> 00:38:08,290
Here we... Oh my God. My neck.

811
00:38:08,370 --> 00:38:12,160
Just gotta get my penis
in the proper position.

812
00:38:14,540 --> 00:38:17,250
Ho-ho! Ho-ho! Ho!

813
00:38:17,330 --> 00:38:19,660
Victory!

814
00:38:19,750 --> 00:38:21,870
A car of that quality,
it's a great investment.

815
00:38:21,950 --> 00:38:25,290
Because anything that has value
truly appreciates over time.

816
00:38:25,370 --> 00:38:26,450
Just like this house.

817
00:38:26,540 --> 00:38:28,580
Ooh. That's a lot.

818
00:38:28,660 --> 00:38:30,580
Whoa! Oh no, no, no, no!

819
00:38:30,660 --> 00:38:31,660
Can't sto...

820
00:38:33,370 --> 00:38:34,700
Ah! It's up my nose!

821
00:38:38,080 --> 00:38:39,540
The point is, you need an agent

822
00:38:39,620 --> 00:38:42,580
who understands
the real value of craftsmanship

823
00:38:42,660 --> 00:38:44,700
and sees your home
as more than just a place to live.

824
00:38:45,290 --> 00:38:47,620
A home is an extension of ourselves.

825
00:38:47,700 --> 00:38:49,870
You put your heart and soul in this place.

826
00:38:49,950 --> 00:38:54,080
Just like I did when I built my company
to be one of the top agencies in New York.

827
00:38:54,160 --> 00:38:55,750
These will be like a giant napkin.

828
00:38:55,830 --> 00:38:57,200
Ow! Okay.

829
00:38:57,290 --> 00:38:58,790
Okay. Nobody saw nothing.

830
00:38:58,870 --> 00:39:01,290
And I just rub like this.

831
00:39:01,370 --> 00:39:03,040
And...

832
00:39:06,120 --> 00:39:08,620
Oh, fuck me. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

833
00:39:08,700 --> 00:39:12,250
I know when you accept an offer, you put
a number on the value of your labor.

834
00:39:12,330 --> 00:39:15,000
- And I promise I will--
- Sorry. We should cut.

835
00:39:15,080 --> 00:39:17,080
There's a guy pissing
all over the car out there.

836
00:39:17,160 --> 00:39:20,120
And he shattered the window.
A car drove by and ripped the door off.

837
00:39:20,620 --> 00:39:22,200
Oh my fucking God!

838
00:39:22,290 --> 00:39:24,950
Keep rolling. We can use this.

839
00:39:25,540 --> 00:39:26,500
Oh no.

840
00:39:26,580 --> 00:39:29,160
It's okay. Don't mind me.
I'm Rudd's little brother.

841
00:39:29,250 --> 00:39:30,160
Sorry to interrupt.

842
00:39:30,250 --> 00:39:32,750
I had a little emergency,
but we're all good now.

843
00:39:32,830 --> 00:39:35,000
Jesus Christ, Marcus,
what the hell did you do?

844
00:39:35,080 --> 00:39:36,250
Wait. This is your brother?

845
00:39:36,330 --> 00:39:37,790
No, no, it's my Little Brother

846
00:39:37,870 --> 00:39:39,660
from a charity thing
I did a million years ago.

847
00:39:39,750 --> 00:39:41,500
Listen, Rudd, I can explain every--

848
00:39:42,910 --> 00:39:45,000
- Fuck you!
- Whoa! Hit-and-run. Okay.

849
00:39:45,080 --> 00:39:47,080
- Holy shit.
- I'm calling the police.

850
00:39:47,160 --> 00:39:49,750
- Fucking e-bike.
- Here, put all your weight on me.

851
00:39:49,830 --> 00:39:51,200
I'm sorry. Who are you?

852
00:39:51,290 --> 00:39:53,580
I'm Mia, Rudd's assistant.

853
00:39:53,660 --> 00:39:57,290
Oh. Looks like we got something in common.
We both think Rudd's a fucking boss.

854
00:39:58,580 --> 00:39:59,620
- Oh.
- Ow!

855
00:39:59,700 --> 00:40:01,500
He seems fine. Let's just go back inside.

856
00:40:01,580 --> 00:40:03,620
- Oh no, wait a second.
- Yeah, I'm all good.

857
00:40:03,700 --> 00:40:07,580
I, I could use maybe a Band-Aid
or a couple of napkins.

858
00:40:07,660 --> 00:40:09,200
- Ah!
- That is a lot of blood!

859
00:40:09,290 --> 00:40:11,120
- Uh, medic. Medic.
- Whoa.

860
00:40:11,200 --> 00:40:13,580
- This man's brains are exposed.
- Enormous gash.

861
00:40:13,660 --> 00:40:14,830
- Wow.
- Oh no.

862
00:40:14,910 --> 00:40:16,120
My head's killing me.

863
00:40:16,200 --> 00:40:18,620
Are you sure you don't need
an ambulance or anything?

864
00:40:18,700 --> 00:40:21,950
Nah, as long as I got my big bro with me,
I'm all good.

865
00:40:22,040 --> 00:40:23,120
Right.

866
00:40:23,200 --> 00:40:25,000
Now, Marcus,
where did you say you're from?

867
00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:27,450
- He's had an accident. We should let him--
- Whoo!

868
00:40:27,540 --> 00:40:30,290
I was a foster kid,
and I moved around a ton.

869
00:40:30,370 --> 00:40:32,410
Probably easier to tell you
where I'm not from.

870
00:40:32,500 --> 00:40:35,290
Sixteen foster families. Can you imagine?

871
00:40:35,370 --> 00:40:36,500
How'd you know that?

872
00:40:36,580 --> 00:40:38,950
Oh... I was just guessing.

873
00:40:39,040 --> 00:40:40,950
Uh, based on what Rudd told me.

874
00:40:41,040 --> 00:40:43,870
Anyway, then one day, my life changes.

875
00:40:43,950 --> 00:40:45,750
The day I walked into the YMCA

876
00:40:45,830 --> 00:40:49,080
and signed up for
the Big Brothers, Little Brothers program

877
00:40:49,160 --> 00:40:51,830
and met this angel prince right here.

878
00:40:52,330 --> 00:40:55,700
And when he looked into my eyes
and told me we'd be brothers for life,

879
00:40:55,790 --> 00:40:58,410
I knew I'd never be alone
in this fucked-up world ever again.

880
00:41:01,790 --> 00:41:03,450
I'm sure it wasn't as bad as you think.

881
00:41:03,540 --> 00:41:05,450
Are you kidding me?
He ruined the whole thing!

882
00:41:05,540 --> 00:41:07,540
Total disaster. It was going great.

883
00:41:07,620 --> 00:41:09,330
Everybody was loving it.
Then he fucked me.

884
00:41:09,410 --> 00:41:11,410
I knew he was gonna fuck me,
and he fucked me.

885
00:41:11,500 --> 00:41:13,330
Okay, I hear you.

886
00:41:13,910 --> 00:41:15,160
- You do?
- Yes.

887
00:41:15,250 --> 00:41:16,120
I mean,

888
00:41:16,200 --> 00:41:19,660
the show is really important to you,
and you need our support right now.

889
00:41:19,750 --> 00:41:21,410
- Yes, I do.
- So come here.

890
00:41:21,910 --> 00:41:24,580
Come here. Come over here.

891
00:41:27,250 --> 00:41:28,250
Okay.

892
00:41:28,750 --> 00:41:32,080
All right, just... try to relax, okay?

893
00:41:32,160 --> 00:41:33,700
That's it.

894
00:41:33,790 --> 00:41:36,290
Look, I know I put a lot into this, okay?
It's just...

895
00:41:37,450 --> 00:41:39,870
You know, my whole life,
I've always felt like I...

896
00:41:41,250 --> 00:41:42,950
Like what?

897
00:41:43,040 --> 00:41:46,200
I don't even know how to say this.
Like... I was less than something.

898
00:41:46,290 --> 00:41:48,500
- Like I always have to prove myself.
- Oh my God.

899
00:41:48,580 --> 00:41:51,410
Rudd, you don't have to prove anything.

900
00:41:58,330 --> 00:42:00,040
Babe...

901
00:42:00,120 --> 00:42:02,290
Babe, just... just not right now, okay?

902
00:42:02,370 --> 00:42:03,330
Please.

903
00:42:04,160 --> 00:42:05,830
Are you sure?

904
00:42:05,910 --> 00:42:10,000
It's been a minute since we've taken
a trip down to the boneyard.

905
00:42:13,660 --> 00:42:15,910
Where'd you pick that one up?

906
00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:18,660
- What do you mean?
- I mean, that was his advice, wasn't it?

907
00:42:18,750 --> 00:42:21,370
From your little therapy session you had
in the middle of the night?

908
00:42:21,450 --> 00:42:23,540
- It doesn't matter whose advice it was.
- This guy.

909
00:42:23,620 --> 00:42:25,580
This fucking maniac has
infiltrated our household!

910
00:42:25,660 --> 00:42:28,700
- Jesus. Calm down.
- What is he, our marriage counselor?

911
00:42:28,790 --> 00:42:31,910
I am not taking relationship advice
from him. You and I are fine.

912
00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:34,580
- Are we?
- Oh, I'm not doing this right now.

913
00:42:34,660 --> 00:42:35,830
I need to sweat this out.

914
00:42:35,910 --> 00:42:37,450
Can't we just talk about this?

915
00:42:37,540 --> 00:42:41,080
Why don't you talk about it with Marcus?
He seems to have it all figured out.

916
00:42:41,160 --> 00:42:43,500
Fuck.

917
00:43:01,950 --> 00:43:03,410
Yeah! Fuck me!

918
00:43:03,500 --> 00:43:05,080
I got ketamine from the doctor.

919
00:43:05,160 --> 00:43:07,620
- I wanna try that so badly!
- It's pretty good.

920
00:43:07,700 --> 00:43:10,830
Can you tell me I look like
Eva Longoria in <i>Desperate Housewives</i>?

921
00:43:10,910 --> 00:43:13,330
You look like Eva Longoria
in <i>Desperate Housewives</i>.

922
00:43:13,410 --> 00:43:15,160
Fuck! That's so hot!

923
00:43:16,290 --> 00:43:17,910
Hey, bro.

924
00:43:18,000 --> 00:43:19,290
We making too much noise?

925
00:43:19,370 --> 00:43:21,200
Uh... yes.

926
00:43:21,290 --> 00:43:23,250
Sorry. That's all me.
I'm a bit of a squealer.

927
00:43:23,330 --> 00:43:27,000
Oh. Yeah, you are.
Hey, you remember Nurse Sonj, right?

928
00:43:27,080 --> 00:43:28,700
Sure do. Hey, Nurse Sonj.

929
00:43:28,790 --> 00:43:31,700
Hi, Rudd. Place is gorgeous.
Thanks for having us.

930
00:43:31,790 --> 00:43:34,620
And I forget.
Did you meet her boyfriend, Yayir?

931
00:43:34,700 --> 00:43:35,870
I don't believe I have.

932
00:43:35,950 --> 00:43:38,620
Hello. I like to watch.

933
00:43:38,700 --> 00:43:42,040
Yayir is being modest. He throws out
some pretty killer suggestions.

934
00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:46,200
If you and Deirdre ever wanna open up,
I'll put you in on an email thread.

935
00:43:47,250 --> 00:43:49,790
- We'll try to keep it down.
- Oh, can't make any promises.

936
00:43:49,870 --> 00:43:51,330
Oh shit!

937
00:43:55,120 --> 00:43:56,080
Hon, wake up.

938
00:43:56,160 --> 00:43:58,790
Huh? Oh, now you wanna talk?

939
00:43:58,870 --> 00:44:01,790
Marcus is fucking Nurse Sonj
all over my office.

940
00:44:01,870 --> 00:44:02,700
What?

941
00:44:02,790 --> 00:44:04,500
If that's not enough,
her fucking boyfriend

942
00:44:04,580 --> 00:44:07,000
is just sitting there naked
on my fucking leather chair.

943
00:44:07,080 --> 00:44:08,950
It's a threesome, or is he just watching?

944
00:44:09,450 --> 00:44:11,370
- That's your question?
- It's a big difference.

945
00:44:11,450 --> 00:44:13,120
Aren't they equally inappropriate?

946
00:44:13,200 --> 00:44:16,790
Think about what he's been through.
He's just trying to have a little fun.

947
00:44:17,290 --> 00:44:18,870
At least somebody is.

948
00:44:19,370 --> 00:44:20,410
Wow.

949
00:44:21,080 --> 00:44:22,160
Wow!

950
00:44:22,790 --> 00:44:26,290
- Ooh! God, that was fun.
- It was. Your brother's really nice.

951
00:44:26,370 --> 00:44:28,250
- Oh my God. What a sweetheart, right?
- Yeah.

952
00:44:29,660 --> 00:44:32,330
- Yayir!
- Bro, you fucking killed it, man.

953
00:44:32,410 --> 00:44:34,660
- Great meeting you, dawg.
- Abso... Oh, it was my pleasure.

954
00:44:34,750 --> 00:44:35,790
Whoo!

955
00:44:35,870 --> 00:44:37,200
Boo, so fun.

956
00:44:37,290 --> 00:44:38,540
- Boo.
- Mwah!

957
00:44:40,870 --> 00:44:43,160
Okay. I like that.

958
00:44:43,250 --> 00:44:44,500
I do too.

959
00:44:46,080 --> 00:44:47,120
Mm...

960
00:44:49,000 --> 00:44:50,120
Okay.

961
00:44:50,700 --> 00:44:53,750
Now they're fucking
on the hood of your car, hon. Just FYI.

962
00:44:53,830 --> 00:44:54,750
Hmm?

963
00:44:54,830 --> 00:44:56,700
Ooh, the floodgates are opening!

964
00:44:56,790 --> 00:44:58,200
There goes your car alarm.

965
00:44:58,290 --> 00:45:01,410
Oh, look. Now the Meyersons
are getting a little bit of a show.

966
00:45:01,500 --> 00:45:03,500
We'll get an angry call from them
in the morning.

967
00:45:03,580 --> 00:45:06,250
I'm on this new SSRI.
It takes me forever to come!

968
00:45:06,330 --> 00:45:09,330
- It's working for me!
- God. His stroke game is so weak.

969
00:45:09,830 --> 00:45:11,660
He should take a lesson from you.

970
00:45:11,750 --> 00:45:13,790
Oh Jesus!

971
00:45:40,160 --> 00:45:41,330
The fuck?

972
00:45:52,830 --> 00:45:53,660
Gotcha.

973
00:45:59,120 --> 00:46:01,040
- What's going on?
- Yeah, Dad. What the fuck?

974
00:46:01,120 --> 00:46:03,040
I'm about to tell you what the fuck.

975
00:46:03,120 --> 00:46:03,950
Sit down.

976
00:46:07,330 --> 00:46:11,660
Rudd, whatever it is...
we're here for you, and we support you.

977
00:46:12,250 --> 00:46:16,200
Great. Because I found something.
Something rather alarming.

978
00:46:16,290 --> 00:46:17,580
Ah, shit.

979
00:46:18,080 --> 00:46:19,870
Is it on the shaft or the groin area?

980
00:46:20,660 --> 00:46:23,080
It's not on any...

981
00:46:23,160 --> 00:46:24,120
God.

982
00:46:24,870 --> 00:46:25,830
I gotta take this.

983
00:46:27,500 --> 00:46:30,330
Nurse Sonj has a similar situation.

984
00:46:31,330 --> 00:46:34,120
- Hello?
- Hey, TV star!

985
00:46:34,200 --> 00:46:35,290
You fucking did it.

986
00:46:35,370 --> 00:46:37,500
Really? That's amazing.

987
00:46:37,580 --> 00:46:39,790
<i>Yeah, you guys are magic together.</i>

988
00:46:39,870 --> 00:46:41,620
- Me and Kieran?
- <i>You and Marcus.</i>

989
00:46:41,700 --> 00:46:44,370
<i>The network really responded to him.</i>

990
00:46:46,370 --> 00:46:47,450
- Really?
- <i>Yeah.</i>

991
00:46:47,540 --> 00:46:50,700
<i>The... the uptight, older, rich, white guy</i>

992
00:46:50,790 --> 00:46:52,910
reuniting with his, uh, underprivileged,

993
00:46:53,000 --> 00:46:56,660
diverse, younger,
arguably hotter, long-lost brother.

994
00:46:56,750 --> 00:46:58,120
It's fucking classic, Rudd.

995
00:46:58,200 --> 00:47:00,330
- Yeah, sure.
- <i>It has it all.</i>

996
00:47:00,410 --> 00:47:02,660
Rags to riches. Wish fulfillment.

997
00:47:02,750 --> 00:47:05,290
White guy getting his car banged up.
Love to see it.

998
00:47:05,370 --> 00:47:07,450
<i>Let's see him struggle once.</i>

999
00:47:07,540 --> 00:47:09,620
- <i>For once in his life.</i>
- <i>Just a little.</i>

1000
00:47:09,700 --> 00:47:11,950
<i>Anyway, we're just gonna need
the two of you to come down</i>

1001
00:47:12,040 --> 00:47:14,540
and shoot a new title sequence
with both of you in it.

1002
00:47:14,620 --> 00:47:16,450
- Him in the title sequence?
- <i>Yeah.</i>

1003
00:47:16,540 --> 00:47:19,410
Marcus really solidifies
your place in the show.

1004
00:47:19,500 --> 00:47:23,250
Otherwise, you're just another meathead
in a suit selling condos.

1005
00:47:23,330 --> 00:47:25,410
<i>- Don't need that.
- Don't need any more.</i>

1006
00:47:25,500 --> 00:47:28,790
But, hey, look, if you're not feeling it,
we could always just focus on Marcus.

1007
00:47:28,870 --> 00:47:30,660
<i>Do a kind of</i> Fresh Prince <i>thing.</i>

1008
00:47:30,750 --> 00:47:33,750
- Yeah, or we could give it to Hayley.
- Mm! I love that.

1009
00:47:33,830 --> 00:47:35,660
Introduce Marcus as <i>her</i> Little Brother.

1010
00:47:35,750 --> 00:47:37,290
- Wait, what?
- <i>That's sexy.</i>

1011
00:47:37,370 --> 00:47:40,660
<i>Hey, anyway, we're hoping to make
a decision by this afternoon. Okay.</i>

1012
00:47:40,750 --> 00:47:43,790
- Ciao. Ciao for real.
- Bye, brother. Love you like a brother.

1013
00:47:47,200 --> 00:47:48,500
You were saying?

1014
00:47:51,580 --> 00:47:53,450
Yeah, I... I was saying...

1015
00:47:56,370 --> 00:47:57,870
As you may have noticed, Marcus,

1016
00:47:57,950 --> 00:48:00,580
I wasn't necessarily
100% on board with you being here.

1017
00:48:00,660 --> 00:48:02,040
What?

1018
00:48:03,000 --> 00:48:04,500
Did anyone else pick up on that?

1019
00:48:04,580 --> 00:48:05,700
Regardless...

1020
00:48:07,750 --> 00:48:10,290
...possibly, I have judged you too quickly.

1021
00:48:10,790 --> 00:48:12,080
That's on me.

1022
00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:14,700
Those are just my own insecurities
lashing out.

1023
00:48:14,790 --> 00:48:17,830
- I apologize for that, and...
- Oh...

1024
00:48:18,870 --> 00:48:21,660
...it's good to have you back in my life.

1025
00:48:23,160 --> 00:48:24,790
What was that, bro?

1026
00:48:24,870 --> 00:48:26,950
Yeah, Dad,
you kind of mumbled that last part.

1027
00:48:27,790 --> 00:48:31,410
I said, it is good
to have you back in my life.

1028
00:48:32,540 --> 00:48:35,080
- Come on, Marcus, keep it together.
- Oh...

1029
00:48:35,160 --> 00:48:37,790
Those are only the most beautiful words
you've ever heard.

1030
00:48:37,870 --> 00:48:40,120
I am so proud of you, hon.

1031
00:48:40,200 --> 00:48:42,200
Aw...

1032
00:48:42,290 --> 00:48:44,160
I thought you said
you found something alarming.

1033
00:48:44,250 --> 00:48:45,200
I did.

1034
00:48:46,910 --> 00:48:48,870
Deep within myself.

1035
00:48:48,950 --> 00:48:49,950
Oh, great.

1036
00:48:51,580 --> 00:48:55,200
Well... I have some big news too.

1037
00:48:55,700 --> 00:48:57,830
I reached out
to Big Brothers, Little Brothers,

1038
00:48:57,910 --> 00:49:01,370
and I told them your story,
and they went crazy for it.

1039
00:49:01,450 --> 00:49:05,910
So crazy that they wanna make you
their honorary Big Brother of the Year.

1040
00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:08,450
Big Brother of the Year?

1041
00:49:08,540 --> 00:49:11,370
Yes! More like Big Brother of the Century!

1042
00:49:11,450 --> 00:49:13,410
We can make it a reunion event

1043
00:49:13,500 --> 00:49:15,540
where we reconnect Big Brothers
with Little Brothers

1044
00:49:15,620 --> 00:49:18,370
who haven't seen each other for a while,
just like you and Marcus.

1045
00:49:18,450 --> 00:49:19,500
And guess what.

1046
00:49:20,000 --> 00:49:22,830
They want Marcus
to present you with the award.

1047
00:49:22,910 --> 00:49:24,660
Isn't that amazing?

1048
00:49:26,000 --> 00:49:28,290
Oh, look, D. He's crying.

1049
00:49:28,370 --> 00:49:30,000
Oh my God.

1050
00:49:30,080 --> 00:49:32,700
Let the tears flow.

1051
00:49:32,790 --> 00:49:34,580
Hmm.

1052
00:49:37,450 --> 00:49:40,040
<i>On</i> NYC Hustlers<i>,
there's a new season</i>

1053
00:49:40,120 --> 00:49:42,660
<i>and a new reason for attitude</i>

1054
00:49:42,750 --> 00:49:44,870
<i>when we add two dudes.</i>

1055
00:49:46,370 --> 00:49:50,580
<i>There's never a dull "bro-ment"
when these two guys are around.</i>

1056
00:49:53,000 --> 00:49:57,200
I don't wanna speak for my big bro here,
but we've been given a gift.

1057
00:49:57,290 --> 00:50:01,370
We get to live together, work together,
go home and talk about work together.

1058
00:50:01,950 --> 00:50:04,000
He exhales. I inhale.

1059
00:50:04,080 --> 00:50:06,080
It's like we're one organism.

1060
00:50:06,580 --> 00:50:10,160
Wanted to show you the stage.
We've got a great lighting designer.

1061
00:50:10,250 --> 00:50:12,750
And on the stage,
we could also get a great photo op

1062
00:50:12,830 --> 00:50:15,250
with everyone wearing
their Little Brothers, Big Brothers hats.

1063
00:50:15,330 --> 00:50:16,700
I think it'll be super cute.

1064
00:50:16,790 --> 00:50:19,450
I was a little hesitant about you
at first.

1065
00:50:19,540 --> 00:50:22,410
I thought you were just
another meathead in a suit selling condos,

1066
00:50:22,500 --> 00:50:24,370
but seeing you with your brother,

1067
00:50:24,450 --> 00:50:25,660
you got a heart.

1068
00:50:26,160 --> 00:50:27,290
And I like heart.

1069
00:50:28,450 --> 00:50:29,540
We'll take it.

1070
00:50:29,620 --> 00:50:32,540
And boom! Mansion accomplished.

1071
00:50:35,200 --> 00:50:36,330
Mansion accomplished!

1072
00:50:36,410 --> 00:50:40,000
That's so funny. It's usually "mission,"
but you said "mansion" instead.

1073
00:50:40,080 --> 00:50:41,250
- Yeah.
- Good one.

1074
00:50:42,500 --> 00:50:45,870
Today is actually the anniversary
of my dead father's passing.

1075
00:50:46,660 --> 00:50:48,870
- Oh.
- Okay, I think we got it, everybody.

1076
00:50:48,950 --> 00:50:50,750
Yeah, that's a wrap. Thank you all.

1077
00:50:50,830 --> 00:50:52,080
- Great.
- Love it.

1078
00:50:52,160 --> 00:50:54,290
- Perfect. Great job.
- Oh my God, Marcus.

1079
00:50:54,370 --> 00:50:56,450
- Yes, chef.
- You are so funny.

1080
00:51:00,410 --> 00:51:02,410
Hey!

1081
00:51:04,700 --> 00:51:06,080
We did it!

1082
00:51:08,450 --> 00:51:10,660
We're living the dream.
Wouldn't you say so, bro?

1083
00:51:11,700 --> 00:51:12,580
Yep.

1084
00:51:13,160 --> 00:51:14,200
Living the dream.

1085
00:51:27,410 --> 00:51:28,910
So what's our plan?

1086
00:51:29,000 --> 00:51:29,870
Plan?

1087
00:51:30,830 --> 00:51:32,160
The Marcus problem.

1088
00:51:32,660 --> 00:51:33,500
Problem?

1089
00:51:34,000 --> 00:51:35,450
Do you have eyes?

1090
00:51:35,540 --> 00:51:38,120
I was the inspiring underdog
who everyone was rooting for,

1091
00:51:38,200 --> 00:51:40,330
and now my screen time is in free fall.

1092
00:51:40,410 --> 00:51:43,700
You and me... we're on death row, my man.

1093
00:51:44,580 --> 00:51:46,870
I know it's not ideal,
but I'm his connection to the show.

1094
00:51:46,950 --> 00:51:48,450
Shouldn't that be good for me?

1095
00:51:48,540 --> 00:51:49,870
That's what Jill Zarin thought

1096
00:51:49,950 --> 00:51:51,830
when she invited
her friend Bethenny Frankel

1097
00:51:51,910 --> 00:51:54,120
onto the set
of <i>Real Housewives of New York City</i>.

1098
00:51:54,700 --> 00:51:57,290
Now Bethenny has
the world's leading skinny margarita mix,

1099
00:51:57,370 --> 00:51:59,040
and Jill lives in Boca,

1100
00:51:59,700 --> 00:52:01,950
where they don't even have
a <i>Housewives</i> franchise.

1101
00:52:02,700 --> 00:52:04,790
- What do we do?
- "We"?

1102
00:52:05,500 --> 00:52:07,450
You let the fox into the hen house.

1103
00:52:07,540 --> 00:52:10,120
Now you need to find
a dog big enough to chase him out.

1104
00:52:11,000 --> 00:52:13,410
- A ten-and-over.
- A ten-million-dollar listing?

1105
00:52:13,500 --> 00:52:14,700
And over.

1106
00:52:15,370 --> 00:52:17,160
A motherfucking showpiece.

1107
00:52:17,790 --> 00:52:19,790
Something they can
build an episode around,

1108
00:52:19,870 --> 00:52:22,500
that keeps the attention on you
and not Marcus.

1109
00:52:23,080 --> 00:52:25,370
Whatever it is,
you better think of something fast,

1110
00:52:25,450 --> 00:52:28,750
or your little brother is gonna
send us both to Boca.

1111
00:52:29,830 --> 00:52:32,080
And you will never be the big dog.

1112
00:52:42,830 --> 00:52:45,370
Hey. You have a minute to talk?

1113
00:52:47,160 --> 00:52:48,620
Hmm.

1114
00:52:51,410 --> 00:52:52,410
Hey, you.

1115
00:52:52,500 --> 00:52:54,040
Hey!

1116
00:52:54,120 --> 00:52:55,330
Making coffee, huh?

1117
00:52:55,410 --> 00:52:57,080
- Yeah, you want some?
- Sure.

1118
00:52:57,580 --> 00:53:01,000
I actually like mine with honey
and a little cayenne pepper.

1119
00:53:01,080 --> 00:53:02,870
- Get out.
- Gives it an extra kick.

1120
00:53:02,950 --> 00:53:04,330
What? That's how I like it.

1121
00:53:04,410 --> 00:53:06,750
- Stop it.
- Yes. I'm making it like that right now.

1122
00:53:06,830 --> 00:53:09,700
- That is so fucking random.
- I love it that way. Yeah.

1123
00:53:09,790 --> 00:53:11,540
Gosh. Crazy.

1124
00:53:11,620 --> 00:53:12,830
Okay, enjoy.

1125
00:53:12,910 --> 00:53:15,160
- Cheers.
- Yeah...

1126
00:53:17,200 --> 00:53:18,620
Do you mind if I play music?

1127
00:53:18,700 --> 00:53:20,250
Oh yeah. Be my guest.

1128
00:53:24,500 --> 00:53:25,410
Hold up.

1129
00:53:25,910 --> 00:53:27,040
Hoobastank?

1130
00:53:27,120 --> 00:53:29,580
Get the fuck outta here, girl.

1131
00:53:29,660 --> 00:53:32,370
You're putting on motherfucking 'stank
in the middle of the day?

1132
00:53:32,450 --> 00:53:34,200
Yeah. It's one of my favorites.

1133
00:53:34,790 --> 00:53:37,250
Really bittersweet, but yet...

1134
00:53:37,330 --> 00:53:40,330
- Uplifting, yes!
- Uplifting. That's what I was gonna say.

1135
00:53:40,410 --> 00:53:42,910
That's, like, kind of
me and Rudd's favorite song.

1136
00:53:43,910 --> 00:53:48,200
We talked about it over email a <i>ton.</i>
I mean, it's kind of our thing, you know?

1137
00:53:48,290 --> 00:53:50,620
- Your thing?
- Yeah.

1138
00:53:50,700 --> 00:53:52,160
- You and Rudd.
- Yeah.

1139
00:53:52,250 --> 00:53:53,200
Totally.

1140
00:53:53,910 --> 00:53:56,580
Hey, can I ask you something? Um...

1141
00:53:57,160 --> 00:53:59,000
You're Rudd's assistant. Um...

1142
00:53:59,790 --> 00:54:02,620
Do you have any tips
on how to, uh... connect with him?

1143
00:54:02,700 --> 00:54:05,330
We had this magic over email,
but since I've been here,

1144
00:54:05,410 --> 00:54:07,700
it kind of feels like
he doesn't want me around.

1145
00:54:07,790 --> 00:54:10,330
I'm just... trying to get
that old spark back.

1146
00:54:10,910 --> 00:54:13,370
What did you like about his emails?

1147
00:54:13,450 --> 00:54:15,700
Uh, pff, girl,
just about every damn thing.

1148
00:54:15,790 --> 00:54:18,540
So funny and smart.

1149
00:54:18,620 --> 00:54:20,080
Emoji game, tight.

1150
00:54:20,160 --> 00:54:21,200
Yeah.

1151
00:54:21,290 --> 00:54:23,120
We just really connected, you know?

1152
00:54:23,200 --> 00:54:24,790
Listen.

1153
00:54:24,870 --> 00:54:27,620
He's been really focused on the show,

1154
00:54:27,700 --> 00:54:30,370
and he's kind of insecure
about the whole thing.

1155
00:54:30,450 --> 00:54:31,330
Mm!

1156
00:54:31,410 --> 00:54:35,160
So if you could just let him have
the spotlight every once in a while...

1157
00:54:35,250 --> 00:54:36,830
Wait. Was I hogging the spotlight?

1158
00:54:36,910 --> 00:54:40,000
- Just a little bit.
- Ugh! God, I had no idea.

1159
00:54:40,080 --> 00:54:42,910
Thank you, Mia. It's been really nice
working alongside you.

1160
00:54:43,000 --> 00:54:45,080
- Same.
- Yeah.

1161
00:54:45,660 --> 00:54:46,910
'Kay, see you.

1162
00:54:47,000 --> 00:54:47,950
- Bye.
- Bye.

1163
00:54:49,830 --> 00:54:52,040
The way I see it,
great opportunity for you,

1164
00:54:52,120 --> 00:54:54,370
not just financially,
but also professionally.

1165
00:54:54,450 --> 00:54:56,870
Being on the show's gonna get you
top dollar for the house,

1166
00:54:56,950 --> 00:54:59,700
but at the same time,
you can promote your personal brand.

1167
00:54:59,790 --> 00:55:02,700
Ruddy, Ruddy, Ruddy, you gotta relax.

1168
00:55:02,790 --> 00:55:04,790
Selling me so hard,
you're gonna blow out a hammy.

1169
00:55:04,870 --> 00:55:07,660
You wanna list my house
for the show? I'm in.

1170
00:55:07,750 --> 00:55:09,660
- You are?
- Sure. Why not?

1171
00:55:09,750 --> 00:55:11,660
In fact, we should do it this weekend.

1172
00:55:11,750 --> 00:55:15,040
Throw a big bash, invite some VIPs
for the cameras. You bring the family.

1173
00:55:15,120 --> 00:55:16,250
We'll make a day of it.

1174
00:55:16,330 --> 00:55:19,250
Josh... man, you don't know
what this means to me.

1175
00:55:19,870 --> 00:55:22,450
- Anything for my baby bro.
- Ha!

1176
00:55:22,540 --> 00:55:25,120
So I'm gonna tell the producers
you're gonna give me the listing?

1177
00:55:25,790 --> 00:55:27,620
Why don't we save that for the show?

1178
00:55:28,120 --> 00:55:29,370
Make it more interesting.

1179
00:55:29,870 --> 00:55:30,950
Yeah. Yeah.

1180
00:55:31,040 --> 00:55:32,790
Yeah. Of course.

1181
00:55:34,660 --> 00:55:38,040
- You're gonna give me the listing, right?
- Don't even worry about that.

1182
00:55:41,200 --> 00:55:44,620
So... how are things with you and Rudd?

1183
00:55:44,700 --> 00:55:46,290
Mm... I don't know.

1184
00:55:46,370 --> 00:55:48,540
I feel like
he's opening up more emotionally,

1185
00:55:48,620 --> 00:55:52,160
and I've made myself more available,
but it doesn't seem like he's interested.

1186
00:55:52,250 --> 00:55:55,580
- Ah...
- He's just still so in his head.

1187
00:55:57,290 --> 00:55:59,500
Desperate times
call for desperate measures.

1188
00:56:00,000 --> 00:56:02,120
You might wanna think
about eating that ass.

1189
00:56:03,330 --> 00:56:04,160
Excuse me?

1190
00:56:04,830 --> 00:56:06,660
Wait. Have you never done it?

1191
00:56:06,750 --> 00:56:08,370
- No!
- Are you--

1192
00:56:08,450 --> 00:56:10,540
Wait. Isn't that kind of gross?

1193
00:56:10,620 --> 00:56:13,370
Oh my God. Are you kidding me?

1194
00:56:13,450 --> 00:56:16,080
- It's the oldest form of lovemaking.
- No.

1195
00:56:16,160 --> 00:56:19,330
And getting your flavor cave tongued
is the ultimate hard reset.

1196
00:56:19,410 --> 00:56:20,370
Wait. Hard reset?

1197
00:56:20,450 --> 00:56:23,620
You know when you turn on your phone
and you wipe the drive clean?

1198
00:56:23,700 --> 00:56:26,290
That's what having someone
go Joey Chestnut on your cinnamon ring

1199
00:56:26,370 --> 00:56:27,540
does to the human brain.

1200
00:56:27,620 --> 00:56:30,790
- Oh my God.
- Restores factory settings.

1201
00:56:30,870 --> 00:56:32,790
- You're serious.
- Oh yeah!

1202
00:56:32,870 --> 00:56:36,450
You wanna get him out of his head,
you gotta get into his ass.

1203
00:56:36,950 --> 00:56:40,200
And personally, I think giving's
even better than receiving.

1204
00:56:40,290 --> 00:56:41,700
Oh my God.

1205
00:56:41,790 --> 00:56:43,620
You are something else.

1206
00:56:43,700 --> 00:56:45,000
Oh my God.

1207
00:56:45,080 --> 00:56:46,290
- Bottoms up.
- Whoo!

1208
00:56:51,700 --> 00:56:53,500
And then she baked <i>me</i> cookies.

1209
00:56:53,580 --> 00:56:55,450
How cute is that?

1210
00:56:55,540 --> 00:56:58,120
I mean, everyone
at Big Brothers, Little Brothers

1211
00:56:58,200 --> 00:56:59,870
has just been incredible.

1212
00:56:59,950 --> 00:57:02,080
I feel like I've finally found
my true calling.

1213
00:57:03,620 --> 00:57:04,540
Hmm.

1214
00:57:05,790 --> 00:57:08,120
You okay? You seem quiet.

1215
00:57:08,200 --> 00:57:11,080
I just don't get it.
Why's Josh letting me do this?

1216
00:57:11,160 --> 00:57:12,410
Do what?

1217
00:57:12,500 --> 00:57:13,870
Put his house on the show.

1218
00:57:13,950 --> 00:57:16,040
I mean, like, what's his angle?

1219
00:57:16,540 --> 00:57:19,080
Maybe because you asked him
and he cares about you.

1220
00:57:19,160 --> 00:57:20,700
Definitely not that.

1221
00:57:20,790 --> 00:57:22,750
He wouldn't even tell me
if I got the listing.

1222
00:57:23,330 --> 00:57:25,540
Feel like he's setting me up
for something. But what?

1223
00:57:25,620 --> 00:57:27,750
Okay, I've had it with this shit.
Pull over.

1224
00:57:27,830 --> 00:57:28,660
What? Why?

1225
00:57:28,750 --> 00:57:30,160
I'm sick of you being in your head,

1226
00:57:30,250 --> 00:57:32,700
so stressed about the show
and your fucking brother.

1227
00:57:32,790 --> 00:57:34,790
You're as tight as a fucking teenage nun.

1228
00:57:34,870 --> 00:57:36,750
- Excuse me?
- You heard me. Pull the fuck over!

1229
00:57:43,000 --> 00:57:43,910
What?

1230
00:57:54,080 --> 00:57:55,620
We haven't done this in a while.

1231
00:57:59,370 --> 00:58:01,750
- The zipper's stuck.
- The belt's a double hook.

1232
00:58:01,830 --> 00:58:03,000
- God!
- Okay, okay.

1233
00:58:03,080 --> 00:58:05,370
- If I can... If I can get...
- Hold on. Put the window down.

1234
00:58:05,450 --> 00:58:07,200
Go out the window,
I can take your pants off.

1235
00:58:07,290 --> 00:58:09,370
- All right. Yeah.
- Go, go, go. That's it.

1236
00:58:09,450 --> 00:58:11,040
- Goddamn it, come on!
- That's it.

1237
00:58:11,120 --> 00:58:13,450
- Okay. I'm gonna... If I can...
- That's it.

1238
00:58:13,540 --> 00:58:15,120
Turn around. Turn around!

1239
00:58:15,700 --> 00:58:17,000
- Okay.
- Like that.

1240
00:58:21,120 --> 00:58:25,450
<i>I wanna do something freaky to you</i>

1241
00:58:25,540 --> 00:58:27,080
<i>Baby</i>

1242
00:58:28,410 --> 00:58:29,830
Is that your dad's car?

1243
00:58:30,830 --> 00:58:33,580
- It sure looks like it.
- Wait. What are they doing?

1244
00:58:36,370 --> 00:58:37,870
Why is Dad facing that way?

1245
00:58:38,450 --> 00:58:41,040
I can't really make sense
of how they're arranged.

1246
00:58:41,620 --> 00:58:43,500
You will someday, son.

1247
00:58:43,580 --> 00:58:44,790
You will someday.

1248
00:58:45,870 --> 00:58:50,450
<i>I'd love to slide down
Into your canyon</i>

1249
00:58:50,540 --> 00:58:51,700
<i>Slide now</i>

1250
00:58:51,790 --> 00:58:54,370
<i>- In the valley of love
- In the valley of love</i>

1251
00:58:54,450 --> 00:58:55,290
Wow.

1252
00:58:55,370 --> 00:58:57,790
Rudd, you look so cool.

1253
00:58:57,870 --> 00:58:59,790
Thank you, Mia. You look lovely.

1254
00:58:59,870 --> 00:59:02,000
They already started filming.
Everyone's ready for you.

1255
00:59:02,080 --> 00:59:03,410
Oh no, they're not.

1256
00:59:08,370 --> 00:59:09,410
Wow.

1257
00:59:15,450 --> 00:59:18,290
Oh, hi. Uh, your mintiest drink, please.

1258
00:59:18,790 --> 00:59:19,870
Perfect.

1259
00:59:20,450 --> 00:59:21,790
Hmm. Hmm.

1260
00:59:21,870 --> 00:59:24,370
Uh-huh.

1261
00:59:24,450 --> 00:59:25,660
Oh!

1262
00:59:25,750 --> 00:59:27,540
Wow! Goddamn!

1263
00:59:27,620 --> 00:59:29,410
Look at this majestic silverback.

1264
00:59:29,500 --> 00:59:31,250
Atilla the Hunk.

1265
00:59:31,330 --> 00:59:34,620
I can't wait to hang back
and watch you shine, twin.

1266
00:59:34,700 --> 00:59:35,580
Hang back?

1267
00:59:35,660 --> 00:59:38,370
Yes! That spotlight,
all on you tonight, my man.

1268
00:59:38,450 --> 00:59:41,910
I'm the wingman.
You're the king, man. Come on, now.

1269
00:59:43,620 --> 00:59:46,120
Thanks, Marcus. I really appreciate that.

1270
00:59:48,200 --> 00:59:49,790
- Wow!
- Hey.

1271
00:59:49,870 --> 00:59:50,750
Okay.

1272
00:59:50,830 --> 00:59:52,580
Hey.

1273
00:59:52,660 --> 00:59:54,790
- God. You look gorgeous.
- Thanks.

1274
00:59:54,870 --> 00:59:57,410
I love this. Reminds me of Lil' Kim
in my favorite Missy video.

1275
00:59:57,500 --> 00:59:59,370
- "Supa Dupa Fly."
- "...Fly."

1276
01:00:01,040 --> 01:00:02,660
- How funny.
- Get out of my head.

1277
01:00:02,750 --> 01:00:04,370
Just call me Lil' Kimchi.

1278
01:00:04,450 --> 01:00:05,830
- Hello.
- Yeah.

1279
01:00:05,910 --> 01:00:07,950
- I'm kidding. I prefer Mia.
- Okay, yeah.

1280
01:00:08,040 --> 01:00:09,750
I look, and I see land ho. Hey.

1281
01:00:09,830 --> 01:00:11,120
- Big bro.
- Hey.

1282
01:00:11,200 --> 01:00:14,000
Man, this place looks more impressive
every time I see it.

1283
01:00:14,080 --> 01:00:15,830
Man, that's just your reflection, stud.

1284
01:00:15,910 --> 01:00:18,200
You tell them how you got this?
You guys have to hear this.

1285
01:00:18,290 --> 01:00:21,250
Oh, hey. I wanna thank you for that advice
you gave me about Rudd.

1286
01:00:21,330 --> 01:00:23,830
It was actually a nice, genuine moment
we just had.

1287
01:00:23,910 --> 01:00:25,330
It's paying huge dividends.

1288
01:00:25,410 --> 01:00:27,200
- I mean, look at him.
- One, two, three.

1289
01:00:27,290 --> 01:00:29,080
Ah!

1290
01:00:29,160 --> 01:00:30,700
Oh my God.

1291
01:00:30,790 --> 01:00:33,950
Hey, you wanna hang back with me
and watch the big dog do his thing?

1292
01:00:34,040 --> 01:00:34,870
I'd love that.

1293
01:00:35,450 --> 01:00:36,540
Okay.

1294
01:00:39,950 --> 01:00:43,080
You know, Josh personally designed
every aspect of this house.

1295
01:00:43,160 --> 01:00:46,200
So he had to make sure there was room
for one of his true passions,

1296
01:00:46,290 --> 01:00:47,120
Chinese hot pot.

1297
01:00:47,200 --> 01:00:51,410
And my favorite combination
is fish balls and Napa cabbage,

1298
01:00:51,500 --> 01:00:54,450
until tomorrow,
when I have a new favorite, of course.

1299
01:00:54,540 --> 01:00:56,160
Fish balls, huh?

1300
01:00:56,250 --> 01:00:58,000
I didn't know fish had testicles.

1301
01:01:00,330 --> 01:01:02,160
Sh, sh.

1302
01:01:02,250 --> 01:01:03,370
Shit. My bad.

1303
01:01:03,450 --> 01:01:06,160
I was listening from the next room,
and I couldn't help myself.

1304
01:01:06,250 --> 01:01:08,080
Rudd's timing was... Mwah!

1305
01:01:08,160 --> 01:01:09,950
The Little Brother
you were telling me about?

1306
01:01:10,040 --> 01:01:11,870
Yeah. He's gonna hang back for tonight.

1307
01:01:11,950 --> 01:01:15,080
No, no. Don't be ridiculous.
Marcus, get down in here. Have a seat.

1308
01:01:15,160 --> 01:01:17,000
- In there?
- Yeah, come on.

1309
01:01:17,080 --> 01:01:19,410
You know what?
I'm doing my thing out here, so--

1310
01:01:19,500 --> 01:01:21,750
Do your thing in here.

1311
01:01:21,830 --> 01:01:22,660
Okay.

1312
01:01:23,660 --> 01:01:25,700
Deirdre told me all about your story,

1313
01:01:25,790 --> 01:01:28,580
and I gotta tell you, man,
it got me right here.

1314
01:01:28,660 --> 01:01:30,410
You've been wronged by so many people,

1315
01:01:30,500 --> 01:01:32,950
and yet, you still have
so much love to give.

1316
01:01:33,040 --> 01:01:34,660
- Hmm.
- But you know what they say?

1317
01:01:34,750 --> 01:01:36,910
My brother's brother is my brother.

1318
01:01:38,290 --> 01:01:39,790
My man.

1319
01:01:39,870 --> 01:01:42,200
- Oh!
- Oh! You.

1320
01:01:44,910 --> 01:01:48,200
- Can I offer you a fish ball, Marcus?
- Yes, of course. I love hot pot.

1321
01:01:48,290 --> 01:01:51,660
I was fostered by
two 95-year-old Chinese sisters for a bit.

1322
01:01:52,250 --> 01:01:53,200
What do you got here?

1323
01:01:53,290 --> 01:01:55,790
<i>Shui zhu rou. Da bai cai.</i>

1324
01:01:55,870 --> 01:01:57,290
<i>- Yu wan!
- Yu wan!</i>

1325
01:01:57,370 --> 01:01:58,750
- Ho!
- Oh!

1326
01:01:58,830 --> 01:01:59,750
<i>Xie xie.</i>

1327
01:02:01,370 --> 01:02:03,870
- Am I blushing?
- We're gonna get another Emmy.

1328
01:02:06,700 --> 01:02:08,580
Wow. What a spacious master.

1329
01:02:10,410 --> 01:02:12,700
Bro, I think they call it a primary now.

1330
01:02:13,200 --> 01:02:14,790
Oh, I didn't... We should cut.

1331
01:02:14,870 --> 01:02:17,870
- No, just keep on rolling.
- Where the magic happens, huh?

1332
01:02:17,950 --> 01:02:21,040
- What does that mean?
- Oh, you know, like all the sex and stuff.

1333
01:02:25,500 --> 01:02:28,330
Dude is really funny, man.

1334
01:02:28,410 --> 01:02:31,000
Hey, speaking of magic,
let me show you fellas the bathroom.

1335
01:02:31,080 --> 01:02:32,200
Give us a minute.

1336
01:02:32,290 --> 01:02:34,330
This is where the real magic happens.

1337
01:02:38,660 --> 01:02:40,750
Who wants to rim the Grim Reaper?

1338
01:02:45,040 --> 01:02:45,870
What are those?

1339
01:02:45,950 --> 01:02:48,120
I'm not sure.
Justin Timberlake gave them to me.

1340
01:02:48,200 --> 01:02:49,450
Said it's the same shit he took

1341
01:02:49,540 --> 01:02:51,250
when he wrote the song
for that <i>Troll</i> movie,

1342
01:02:51,330 --> 01:02:52,620
so you know it's gotta be good.

1343
01:02:52,700 --> 01:02:55,330
Now, Rudd's a bit of a square,
so he's not gonna indulge.

1344
01:02:55,410 --> 01:02:58,660
- That means, Marcus, it's all yours, baby.
- Um... All right.

1345
01:02:58,750 --> 01:03:00,790
- No. "Square."
- What?

1346
01:03:01,580 --> 01:03:04,040
Oh my God.

1347
01:03:04,830 --> 01:03:05,700
Yo.

1348
01:03:06,200 --> 01:03:07,410
Woo-hoo!

1349
01:03:08,700 --> 01:03:11,540
- I didn't know you partied like that.
- Every day, bro.

1350
01:03:11,620 --> 01:03:13,660
Well, Justin said only do a tiny bump.

1351
01:03:14,620 --> 01:03:17,330
- You didn't mention that.
- Oh, well, anybody else?

1352
01:03:17,410 --> 01:03:20,000
- No.
- All right, let's get out of here.

1353
01:03:20,080 --> 01:03:21,790
- Wait. You're not gonna do any?
- Who, me?

1354
01:03:21,870 --> 01:03:25,660
No, man, I was just being a good host.
The only drug I do is the beat, baby.

1355
01:03:26,250 --> 01:03:27,790
Yeah, I think I'm good too.

1356
01:03:28,660 --> 01:03:29,660
Okay.

1357
01:03:32,330 --> 01:03:34,580
You're fucking us right now.

1358
01:03:34,660 --> 01:03:36,950
You see what's happening here?

1359
01:03:37,040 --> 01:03:39,750
- Joshy!
- My brother's brother is my brother.

1360
01:03:39,830 --> 01:03:43,370
- Marcus is gonna steal this listing.
- <i>The listing is mine.</i>

1361
01:03:44,580 --> 01:03:47,330
<i>You're just another meathead
in a suit selling condos.</i>

1362
01:03:47,410 --> 01:03:49,660
You'll never be the big dog.

1363
01:03:52,830 --> 01:03:55,410
You need to keep Marcus
away from Josh, you little bitch.

1364
01:03:55,500 --> 01:03:57,120
- Bitch.
- Rudd.

1365
01:03:57,200 --> 01:03:58,910
Rudd. Hello?

1366
01:04:00,040 --> 01:04:01,700
The fuck is wrong with this guy?

1367
01:04:20,580 --> 01:04:23,620
I can't believe how much me, you,
and Rudd have in common.

1368
01:04:23,700 --> 01:04:25,000
Yeah, it's pretty nuts.

1369
01:04:25,080 --> 01:04:28,160
I feel like the universe chewed me up
and spit me in your mouth.

1370
01:04:28,250 --> 01:04:30,700
Yeah, we're like a ménage à trois
without sex.

1371
01:04:30,790 --> 01:04:33,620
A human centipede of commonality.

1372
01:04:33,700 --> 01:04:37,950
And that last beat
goes out to my new bro, Marcus!

1373
01:04:38,040 --> 01:04:39,450
Hey, brother man!

1374
01:04:39,540 --> 01:04:40,910
Huh?

1375
01:04:42,540 --> 01:04:43,700
- It's my--
- Marcus.

1376
01:04:43,790 --> 01:04:45,250
- Huh?
- I need your help.

1377
01:04:45,330 --> 01:04:47,790
You need <i>my</i> help?
Oh jeez. I'm actually nervous.

1378
01:04:47,870 --> 01:04:49,790
Go out on the deck. All right?
Wait for me there.

1379
01:04:49,870 --> 01:04:52,330
No matter what, don't come in
until I give you the signal.

1380
01:04:52,410 --> 01:04:55,000
Okay. Uh, sure.

1381
01:04:55,080 --> 01:04:58,330
Rudd, are you okay?
You look like a glazed ham.

1382
01:04:58,410 --> 01:05:01,330
I'm fine. The bass is sucking me off.

1383
01:05:01,410 --> 01:05:02,580
Oh my God.

1384
01:05:03,330 --> 01:05:05,660
There you are, my man.
I've been looking everywhere for you.

1385
01:05:05,750 --> 01:05:09,120
Oh yeah, just putting your amazing view
in my spank bank for later.

1386
01:05:09,200 --> 01:05:12,450
Oh, I get it.
I've pleasured myself to it many times.

1387
01:05:13,160 --> 01:05:14,620
- Brass tacks, my man.
- Yeah.

1388
01:05:14,700 --> 01:05:17,540
I've been playing it cool
with giving Rudd the listing to my place.

1389
01:05:17,620 --> 01:05:20,580
Maybe even acting like
I'm leaning towards giving it to you,

1390
01:05:20,660 --> 01:05:21,580
to up the drama.

1391
01:05:21,660 --> 01:05:23,540
I give the TV people what they want.

1392
01:05:23,620 --> 01:05:26,410
But I want the big man to have
a big win tonight. You get me, right?

1393
01:05:26,500 --> 01:05:28,790
Yeah, of course.
That's like my entire thing.

1394
01:05:28,870 --> 01:05:30,450
Rudd, have you seen Shane?

1395
01:05:30,540 --> 01:05:33,450
Ugh, Deirdre, I don't have time for that.
I'm doing something important.

1396
01:05:33,540 --> 01:05:35,080
What?

1397
01:05:35,160 --> 01:05:38,660
- It looks like you're dancing.
- Yeah, very important dancing, okay?

1398
01:05:38,750 --> 01:05:42,080
I'm keeping the camera on me,
and I'm keeping Marcus away from Josh.

1399
01:05:42,660 --> 01:05:44,370
- Oh God.
- Where's Josh?

1400
01:05:44,450 --> 01:05:46,910
"Where's Josh?" "Where's Josh?"

1401
01:05:48,120 --> 01:05:50,500
- Where's Josh? Where's Josh?!
- I don't know.

1402
01:05:50,580 --> 01:05:51,750
Where's Josh?

1403
01:05:52,540 --> 01:05:53,450
Fuck!

1404
01:05:53,540 --> 01:05:54,750
We're gonna go back in.

1405
01:05:54,830 --> 01:05:57,910
We'll gather the people together,
make the announcement.

1406
01:05:58,000 --> 01:05:59,160
Yeah.

1407
01:05:59,250 --> 01:06:00,750
- I just have one request.
- Mm?

1408
01:06:00,830 --> 01:06:02,580
Can I be the one
to give him the good news?

1409
01:06:03,160 --> 01:06:07,000
My brother's brother is my brother.

1410
01:06:07,080 --> 01:06:08,790
- You got it.
- Yes!

1411
01:06:10,290 --> 01:06:12,120
Yes!

1412
01:06:13,910 --> 01:06:17,080
No! No! No! No! No!

1413
01:06:22,660 --> 01:06:24,000
No! No! No!

1414
01:06:25,790 --> 01:06:27,500
Oh shit!

1415
01:06:27,580 --> 01:06:29,540
- Oh my God. Oh my God.
- What? What?

1416
01:06:29,620 --> 01:06:33,870
Um, he's not breathing. Does anyone know
how to do an emergency tracheotomy?

1417
01:06:34,620 --> 01:06:37,160
I do. One of my foster moms was an EMT.

1418
01:06:37,250 --> 01:06:38,370
Uh, excuse me.

1419
01:06:38,450 --> 01:06:39,750
Uh... Shit. Sorry.

1420
01:06:39,830 --> 01:06:41,410
I'm coming down!

1421
01:06:46,000 --> 01:06:48,450
Oh God.
Rudd's got a metal straw in his pocket.

1422
01:06:48,540 --> 01:06:50,910
He did drugs with it.
No time to explain more.

1423
01:06:51,790 --> 01:06:53,200
- Here.
- Yeah. Okay.

1424
01:06:53,290 --> 01:06:54,370
Once I stab his throat,

1425
01:06:54,450 --> 01:06:56,200
you put pressure on it
to slow the bleeding.

1426
01:06:56,290 --> 01:06:57,660
Okay.

1427
01:06:57,750 --> 01:06:59,120
Oh shit!

1428
01:06:59,200 --> 01:07:00,750
- Ah!
- Oh God.

1429
01:07:00,830 --> 01:07:02,540
Stay with me, buddy.

1430
01:07:05,620 --> 01:07:06,540
Ugh.

1431
01:07:20,910 --> 01:07:23,120
Oh my God. He's breathing!

1432
01:07:23,200 --> 01:07:25,120
Mar... Marcus, you saved him!

1433
01:07:25,200 --> 01:07:26,950
Marcus is a hero!

1434
01:07:29,000 --> 01:07:30,370
Thank you. I didn't... Oh.

1435
01:07:30,450 --> 01:07:31,580
- Incredible.
- Oh my God.

1436
01:07:31,660 --> 01:07:33,700
- No. Please. I mean...
- You are such a star.

1437
01:07:33,790 --> 01:07:36,290
Anyone in my position would have done
the same thing.

1438
01:07:40,330 --> 01:07:41,700
Oh.

1439
01:07:41,790 --> 01:07:43,080
Phew.

1440
01:07:43,160 --> 01:07:45,370
- A miracle!
- Thank God for this dude.

1441
01:07:45,450 --> 01:07:48,080
- Incredible.
- It was nothing, really. Oh God.

1442
01:07:48,160 --> 01:07:51,200
You guys are too kind. Thank you.

1443
01:07:51,290 --> 01:07:53,160
- You guys would've done the same.
- Hero!

1444
01:07:53,250 --> 01:07:55,410
- GOAT. Greatest of all time.
- Stop.

1445
01:07:55,500 --> 01:07:57,750
- I'm just happy he's safe.
- Yeah!

1446
01:07:57,830 --> 01:07:59,830
Let's all clap for Marcus!

1447
01:07:59,910 --> 01:08:01,500
He's a hero, right?

1448
01:08:02,830 --> 01:08:03,700
Wrong!

1449
01:08:03,790 --> 01:08:05,580
Rudd, what are you doing?

1450
01:08:05,660 --> 01:08:07,000
Oh, I don't know, hon.

1451
01:08:07,080 --> 01:08:09,000
Just wondering
when we're gonna cut the shit

1452
01:08:09,080 --> 01:08:12,830
and stop pretending this stranger,
this scam artist, is part of our family.

1453
01:08:12,910 --> 01:08:15,160
Rudd, what are you saying right now, bro?

1454
01:08:15,750 --> 01:08:19,330
Don't "bro" me, all right?
I saw you out on the balcony with Josh.

1455
01:08:19,410 --> 01:08:22,410
You were planning to steal the listing
of this house right from under me.

1456
01:08:22,500 --> 01:08:24,450
What are you talking about?
No, we weren't.

1457
01:08:24,540 --> 01:08:26,200
How can I trust anything you say?

1458
01:08:26,290 --> 01:08:29,750
You've been lying to us the whole time.
Hey, look at this.

1459
01:08:30,750 --> 01:08:31,790
Recognize that?

1460
01:08:33,000 --> 01:08:34,200
Oh shit.

1461
01:08:34,290 --> 01:08:39,700
This is Marcus's hospital bracelet
from a fucking psych ward!

1462
01:08:40,200 --> 01:08:42,750
He's an escaped mental patient.

1463
01:08:44,700 --> 01:08:45,620
What's wrong?

1464
01:08:48,250 --> 01:08:49,700
Nothing to say now, huh?

1465
01:08:51,040 --> 01:08:52,410
No way out of this one, pal.

1466
01:08:57,790 --> 01:08:58,950
Uh...

1467
01:09:00,750 --> 01:09:01,750
He's right.

1468
01:09:03,290 --> 01:09:04,500
I did lie to you.

1469
01:09:05,620 --> 01:09:08,580
I was afraid if I told you the truth
that you wouldn't accept me.

1470
01:09:11,370 --> 01:09:14,450
I've been rejected by so many people...

1471
01:09:16,500 --> 01:09:17,790
that, uh...

1472
01:09:19,160 --> 01:09:21,200
...I started to hate myself.

1473
01:09:22,500 --> 01:09:25,370
At one point, I was so... alone

1474
01:09:25,450 --> 01:09:27,700
that I thought
I might do something drastic.

1475
01:09:28,410 --> 01:09:31,620
So I checked myself
into a recovery center, and...

1476
01:09:33,750 --> 01:09:35,080
...it didn't help at all.

1477
01:09:37,450 --> 01:09:39,500
I guess I'm just meant to be alone.

1478
01:09:43,200 --> 01:09:46,830
I'm sorry I lied to you, Rudd.
But I don't understand.

1479
01:09:46,910 --> 01:09:50,000
- Our emails, we had this connection.
- He didn't write those emails.

1480
01:09:50,700 --> 01:09:51,620
I did.

1481
01:09:53,250 --> 01:09:54,450
Oh my f...

1482
01:09:54,540 --> 01:09:56,750
Goddamn it. You were catfishing me?

1483
01:09:57,370 --> 01:09:59,910
I wasn't catfishing you, Marcus.

1484
01:10:00,500 --> 01:10:02,660
- Everything in those emails was true.
- Fuck.

1485
01:10:02,750 --> 01:10:05,160
I was just pretending to be someone else.

1486
01:10:06,160 --> 01:10:08,910
Okay, maybe that's
the technical definition of catfishing.

1487
01:10:09,000 --> 01:10:11,000
- Yeah.
- But why?

1488
01:10:11,080 --> 01:10:12,830
'Cause I didn't know you at all!

1489
01:10:15,370 --> 01:10:16,540
You're a stranger.

1490
01:10:19,450 --> 01:10:21,500
I am so sorry, Marcus.

1491
01:10:21,580 --> 01:10:22,870
He didn't mean that.

1492
01:10:22,950 --> 01:10:25,000
Yeah, he does.

1493
01:10:26,500 --> 01:10:27,580
But it's okay.

1494
01:10:30,700 --> 01:10:31,870
Goddamn it.

1495
01:10:32,620 --> 01:10:33,700
Marcus, wait!

1496
01:10:35,200 --> 01:10:36,700
Just leave me alone.

1497
01:10:40,160 --> 01:10:41,580
And cut!

1498
01:10:41,660 --> 01:10:43,950
I think we got it. Good work, everybody.

1499
01:10:44,040 --> 01:10:47,450
- That was phenomenal.
- Yeah. Hey, drive safe, okay?

1500
01:10:49,250 --> 01:10:51,790
That was incredible.

1501
01:10:52,500 --> 01:10:53,870
Nice work, big dog.

1502
01:11:01,000 --> 01:11:06,750
<i>You think that you're wise</i>

1503
01:11:07,290 --> 01:11:12,200
<i>And you're really on the ball</i>

1504
01:11:13,540 --> 01:11:16,750
<i>When it comes to love, then winning</i>

1505
01:11:16,830 --> 01:11:19,200
<i>Oh, oh</i>

1506
01:11:19,290 --> 01:11:23,250
<i>You don't know</i>

1507
01:11:24,200 --> 01:11:26,620
<i>Nothing at all</i>

1508
01:11:27,620 --> 01:11:29,910
<i>And you'd better take it</i>

1509
01:11:30,950 --> 01:11:32,450
<i>Take it</i>

1510
01:11:32,540 --> 01:11:36,580
<i>- From a loser
- Take it from a loser</i>

1511
01:11:36,660 --> 01:11:40,540
<i>- Why don't you take it
- Take it, take it</i>

1512
01:11:40,620 --> 01:11:42,950
<i>- From a loser
- Take it from</i>

1513
01:11:43,040 --> 01:11:47,750
<i>- A loser
- Take it from someone who knows</i>

1514
01:11:47,830 --> 01:11:51,040
All right, Marcus,
remember, if I make this, you get an H.

1515
01:11:53,660 --> 01:11:54,620
Yo, Rudd!

1516
01:11:54,700 --> 01:11:55,830
No way!

1517
01:11:55,910 --> 01:11:58,750
- Who's that guy?
- Oh, that's my older brother, Josh.

1518
01:11:58,830 --> 01:12:01,410
He's home from college
and interning at Goldman Sachs.

1519
01:12:01,500 --> 01:12:05,660
He can bench press his own body weight
and has sex with girls.

1520
01:12:05,750 --> 01:12:07,660
- He's the coolest.
- Cooler than you?

1521
01:12:07,750 --> 01:12:10,750
Let's go! I need you to help me
get into a high school party.

1522
01:12:10,830 --> 01:12:13,620
- Sorry, Marcus, I gotta go.
- Same time next week?

1523
01:12:13,700 --> 01:12:15,620
Uh, yeah. For sure, dude. I'll call you.

1524
01:12:19,000 --> 01:12:20,200
Who the fuck was that?

1525
01:12:20,700 --> 01:12:23,410
Just some dumb charity thing
I'm doing for college.

1526
01:12:23,500 --> 01:12:27,160
<i>- Take it from a loser
- Take it from a loser</i>

1527
01:12:27,250 --> 01:12:29,330
<i>- Why don't you take it
- Take it</i>

1528
01:12:29,410 --> 01:12:31,540
<i>- Why don't you take it
- Mm-hmm</i>

1529
01:12:31,620 --> 01:12:33,790
<i>- Take it from a loser
- Take it from</i>

1530
01:12:33,870 --> 01:12:38,330
<i>- A loser
- Take it from someone who knows</i>

1531
01:12:40,000 --> 01:12:41,790
<i>Oh yeah</i>

1532
01:12:49,910 --> 01:12:50,750
Yeah?

1533
01:12:50,830 --> 01:12:53,290
Hey, Big Brother of the Year!

1534
01:12:54,660 --> 01:12:57,330
Just checking in,
making sure you're all set for tomorrow.

1535
01:12:57,410 --> 01:12:59,870
You're still coming to that?
I thought I ruined everything.

1536
01:13:00,950 --> 01:13:02,830
- Wha... what do you mean?
- Huh?

1537
01:13:02,910 --> 01:13:05,160
I don't know.
Destroying Marcus in front of everyone?

1538
01:13:05,250 --> 01:13:07,370
- Putting my brother in the hospital?
- Oh.

1539
01:13:07,450 --> 01:13:09,540
Oh, that. Yeah, hey, you're all good.

1540
01:13:09,620 --> 01:13:12,370
I mean, it's a villain edit for sure.

1541
01:13:12,450 --> 01:13:16,160
- It was giving demonic, sociopath.
- Oof!

1542
01:13:16,250 --> 01:13:18,910
It was like,
"Who raised this monster?" honestly.

1543
01:13:19,000 --> 01:13:19,830
Tough to watch.

1544
01:13:19,910 --> 01:13:23,500
<i>But</i> the network is loving it.
They're eating it up.

1545
01:13:23,580 --> 01:13:26,120
The only problem is,
we don't really have an ending.

1546
01:13:26,200 --> 01:13:27,040
Hmm.

1547
01:13:27,120 --> 01:13:30,620
And the only thing that
audiences love more than an iconic villain

1548
01:13:30,700 --> 01:13:32,040
is a redemption moment.

1549
01:13:32,120 --> 01:13:36,040
<i>And so we think Marcus giving you
the Big Brother of the Year Award</i>

1550
01:13:36,120 --> 01:13:39,620
<i>is the perfect ending
to your season arc, brother.</i>

1551
01:13:39,700 --> 01:13:40,580
Yeah.

1552
01:13:40,660 --> 01:13:42,750
You know,
after what I did the other night,

1553
01:13:42,830 --> 01:13:44,830
I don't think
Marcus is gonna be there, so...

1554
01:13:44,910 --> 01:13:46,620
<i>Let us worry about that.</i>

1555
01:13:46,700 --> 01:13:49,370
<i>Yeah, we...
we've been in this situation before.</i>

1556
01:13:50,200 --> 01:13:51,950
You have? It seems very specific.

1557
01:13:52,040 --> 01:13:53,910
<i>We'll handle the Marcus of it all.</i>

1558
01:13:54,000 --> 01:13:56,410
<i>You just show up and be your great self.</i>

1559
01:13:56,500 --> 01:13:59,830
- Get excited. All right?
- Okay, we view you as family, for real.

1560
01:13:59,910 --> 01:14:01,250
- For real. We love you.
- Love ya.

1561
01:14:01,330 --> 01:14:03,620
If you need anything, call my assistant.

1562
01:14:16,500 --> 01:14:17,620
Jesus.

1563
01:14:19,620 --> 01:14:21,500
<i>Dear Rudd, thanks for your last email.</i>

1564
01:14:21,580 --> 01:14:25,620
<i>Your words were super comforting
during the eviction and the trial.</i>

1565
01:14:25,700 --> 01:14:28,120
<i>You're the best big bro
a guy could ask for.</i>

1566
01:14:28,200 --> 01:14:31,790
<i>Rudd, big bro, how you living?
Thanks for the advice you gave me. The</i>...

1567
01:14:31,870 --> 01:14:33,700
<i>Well, I was in another plane crash,</i>

1568
01:14:33,790 --> 01:14:37,700
<i>and I'm once again
having major survivor's guilt. F my life.</i>

1569
01:14:37,790 --> 01:14:40,000
<i>Hey, brother.
I just feel really alone right now.</i>

1570
01:14:40,080 --> 01:14:41,410
<i>So grateful I can lean on you.</i>

1571
01:14:41,500 --> 01:14:42,750
<i>Dude! Guess what, Rudd.</i>

1572
01:14:42,830 --> 01:14:44,500
<i>I saw a horse the other day,</i>

1573
01:14:44,580 --> 01:14:47,290
<i>and it reminded me
of when we played Horse.</i>

1574
01:14:47,370 --> 01:14:49,950
<i>Remember how I thought
it was called "Whores"?</i>

1575
01:14:50,950 --> 01:14:54,120
<i>First thing I'm doing next time
I see you is challenge you to a rematch</i>

1576
01:14:54,200 --> 01:14:55,080
<i>on the courts.</i>

1577
01:14:55,160 --> 01:14:58,660
<i>Hey, Rudd. I'm so grateful
to be able to call you my brother,</i>

1578
01:14:58,750 --> 01:15:01,040
<i>the only family that hasn't abandoned me.</i>

1579
01:15:01,120 --> 01:15:03,410
<i>Brothers for life.</i>

1580
01:15:03,500 --> 01:15:05,120
<i>Brothers for life.</i>

1581
01:15:05,200 --> 01:15:06,660
<i>Brothers for life.</i>

1582
01:15:33,700 --> 01:15:36,870
Boys, I really appreciate
you being here for me for my big speech.

1583
01:15:36,950 --> 01:15:39,540
We're not here for you.
We're here for Mom.

1584
01:15:39,620 --> 01:15:42,160
Yeah, to be honest, we're not psyched
about you accepting an award

1585
01:15:42,250 --> 01:15:44,620
for helping a guy
whose life you ruined, so...

1586
01:15:44,700 --> 01:15:47,000
I'll admit, not my finest moment.

1587
01:15:47,080 --> 01:15:48,910
But they say
Marcus is gonna be here today,

1588
01:15:49,000 --> 01:15:51,040
so maybe we patch things up
and move forward.

1589
01:15:51,120 --> 01:15:52,830
We're gonna go find seats.

1590
01:15:58,500 --> 01:15:59,950
And everybody's happy.

1591
01:16:02,040 --> 01:16:04,540
Amazing. Hon, you did such a great job.

1592
01:16:04,620 --> 01:16:05,870
Yeah. Thanks.

1593
01:16:08,950 --> 01:16:10,660
I know you were looking forward to this.

1594
01:16:11,160 --> 01:16:14,500
- If what I did took away from that--
- Oh, I'm... I'm used to it.

1595
01:16:15,000 --> 01:16:18,830
Right back where I started,
throwing a big event for a fake cause.

1596
01:16:19,330 --> 01:16:20,620
Enjoy your night.

1597
01:16:24,620 --> 01:16:26,790
- There you are.
- Hey. You seen Marcus?

1598
01:16:26,870 --> 01:16:30,660
No. I wouldn't be surprised
if he never wants to see me ever again.

1599
01:16:30,750 --> 01:16:32,450
Really? I thought you two hit it off.

1600
01:16:32,540 --> 01:16:36,870
He liked me. But he was
still just getting to know me.

1601
01:16:37,540 --> 01:16:39,250
He <i>loved</i> you.

1602
01:16:40,910 --> 01:16:42,910
Oh, you made it! I'm so happy you're here.

1603
01:16:43,700 --> 01:16:44,700
Marcus?

1604
01:16:49,080 --> 01:16:51,120
Marcus, I'm so glad you're here.

1605
01:16:51,200 --> 01:16:53,540
Of course, big bro.
Wouldn't miss it for the world.

1606
01:16:53,620 --> 01:16:56,160
Oh, look at you two getting along already.
I love it.

1607
01:16:56,250 --> 01:16:57,580
Yeah, but that's not Marcus.

1608
01:16:57,660 --> 01:16:59,660
What are you, the cops?

1609
01:16:59,750 --> 01:17:00,870
No, it's a body double.

1610
01:17:00,950 --> 01:17:03,500
He's gonna hand you your award on stage,

1611
01:17:03,580 --> 01:17:06,120
and then we are going to
paste Marcus's real face

1612
01:17:06,200 --> 01:17:08,080
right onto him using VFX.

1613
01:17:08,160 --> 01:17:10,160
- You can do that?
- "You can do that?"

1614
01:17:11,540 --> 01:17:12,830
Yeah, we can do that.

1615
01:17:12,910 --> 01:17:15,700
Most of the Oscar speeches you see,
people are busy, so it's just that.

1616
01:17:15,790 --> 01:17:18,200
We do that.
So he's going to give you your award.

1617
01:17:18,290 --> 01:17:20,620
You're gonna make your speech,
then Marcus here

1618
01:17:20,700 --> 01:17:23,000
is gonna give you a big ol' hug and say...

1619
01:17:23,080 --> 01:17:24,040
Love you, big bro.

1620
01:17:24,120 --> 01:17:26,750
- Aw!
- "Love you, big bro." I'm crying.

1621
01:17:26,830 --> 01:17:30,080
- And the Internet goes crazy.
- Talk about a viral moment.

1622
01:17:30,870 --> 01:17:33,910
You know, it's for the best
that Matilda broke up with me,

1623
01:17:34,000 --> 01:17:36,200
'cause dating a rock was so hard.

1624
01:17:36,290 --> 01:17:38,620
But this new relationship,

1625
01:17:38,700 --> 01:17:41,580
it's so much sexually softer,

1626
01:17:41,660 --> 01:17:42,830
and the smell...

1627
01:17:42,910 --> 01:17:46,160
Oh, okay. Okay, Keith.
That's a... that's a great... great share.

1628
01:17:46,250 --> 01:17:49,580
Um, let's hit the pause button on that.
To be continued, yeah?

1629
01:17:50,580 --> 01:17:52,370
Oh Jesus!

1630
01:17:52,450 --> 01:17:54,160
Ow.

1631
01:17:54,250 --> 01:17:55,450
- Ow.
- Marcus?

1632
01:17:55,950 --> 01:17:57,790
We've been over this.

1633
01:17:57,870 --> 01:17:59,870
- We can't readmit you.
- Why not?

1634
01:17:59,950 --> 01:18:02,580
We just finished repairing
the other ceiling you destroyed.

1635
01:18:02,660 --> 01:18:04,700
Why didn't you just
walk through the front door?

1636
01:18:04,790 --> 01:18:07,160
I told you. I was trying to sneak back in.

1637
01:18:07,250 --> 01:18:09,200
You didn't need to sneak out
in the first place.

1638
01:18:09,290 --> 01:18:11,410
You were here voluntarily.

1639
01:18:11,500 --> 01:18:13,250
Doc, I feel like
you're not listening to me.

1640
01:18:13,330 --> 01:18:16,500
No, you're not listening.
Look, I know you've had a hard life.

1641
01:18:16,580 --> 01:18:18,330
But there's nothing
medically wrong with you.

1642
01:18:18,410 --> 01:18:21,250
You're just... kinda weird
and extremely lonely.

1643
01:18:21,330 --> 01:18:23,700
Are you kidding me?
Look at me. I'm a mess.

1644
01:18:24,290 --> 01:18:27,000
I went out, and society chewed me up
and it spit me out.

1645
01:18:27,080 --> 01:18:29,250
I need you, Doc. I need help.

1646
01:18:29,330 --> 01:18:30,410
- I'll suck your dick.
- What?

1647
01:18:30,500 --> 01:18:32,370
I'll suck your dick. Look away!

1648
01:18:32,450 --> 01:18:34,370
- I'll suck it.
- Marcus. Marcus, listen to me.

1649
01:18:34,450 --> 01:18:37,250
Barring some sort of psychotic break...

1650
01:18:37,330 --> 01:18:39,830
...there... there's really nothing I can do.

1651
01:18:39,910 --> 01:18:40,790
- Okay?
- Okay.

1652
01:18:40,870 --> 01:18:43,080
- I want you to stand up.
- Sorry. That was inappropriate.

1653
01:18:43,160 --> 01:18:44,290
- I'm getting up.
- All right.

1654
01:18:44,370 --> 01:18:45,500
I'm okay.

1655
01:18:45,580 --> 01:18:47,450
- Okay.
- And I'm walking away.

1656
01:18:47,540 --> 01:18:48,870
Good. Good.

1657
01:18:51,620 --> 01:18:53,040
No, no, no!

1658
01:18:54,290 --> 01:18:55,450
Not again.

1659
01:18:57,200 --> 01:18:58,200
- How's this, Doc?
- Marcus.

1660
01:18:58,290 --> 01:19:00,290
Is this "psychotic break" enough for you?

1661
01:19:00,370 --> 01:19:03,330
- I'm fucking loco, <i>ese</i>!
- Fuck me.

1662
01:19:03,410 --> 01:19:06,700
I am honored
to be giving out such a special award,

1663
01:19:06,790 --> 01:19:11,450
one that only goes
to the most deserving of Big Brothers.

1664
01:19:11,540 --> 01:19:17,250
Someone who's dependable, humble,
and always puts his Little Brother first.

1665
01:19:17,750 --> 01:19:21,540
A man who would never turn his back
on someone in need...

1666
01:19:21,620 --> 01:19:24,790
- Hey, looking good, Uncle Josh.
- ...even if doing so would benefit him...

1667
01:19:24,870 --> 01:19:27,660
Doctors say
I'm gonna make a full recovery.

1668
01:19:27,750 --> 01:19:29,080
Oh, what is that thing?

1669
01:19:29,160 --> 01:19:31,160
Electrolarynx.

1670
01:19:31,660 --> 01:19:33,120
Only temporary.

1671
01:19:33,200 --> 01:19:35,790
But it's the same one Michael Douglas used

1672
01:19:35,870 --> 01:19:39,450
after he got throat cancer
from eating his wife's pussy.

1673
01:19:41,040 --> 01:19:43,750
- Yeah.
- But not my husband, my Rudd.

1674
01:19:44,250 --> 01:19:47,370
So please welcome
our Big Brother of the Year,

1675
01:19:47,450 --> 01:19:49,250
Rudd Landy.

1676
01:20:04,160 --> 01:20:05,540
Love you, big bro.

1677
01:20:07,580 --> 01:20:10,700
Thank you, Deirdre,
for that incredibly gracious introduction.

1678
01:20:10,790 --> 01:20:14,120
Thank you, Big Brothers, Little Brothers,
for honoring me with this award.

1679
01:20:16,040 --> 01:20:19,410
Thank you, Marcus,
for coming into my life.

1680
01:20:20,160 --> 01:20:21,370
And I mean, look at us.

1681
01:20:21,450 --> 01:20:24,120
All these years later
and our bond couldn't be stronger.

1682
01:20:24,200 --> 01:20:27,580
Heck, sometimes I forget
we aren't actual brothers.

1683
01:20:47,410 --> 01:20:48,580
I can't do this.

1684
01:20:51,750 --> 01:20:53,790
Everything I just said was bullshit.

1685
01:20:53,870 --> 01:20:56,870
- What is he doing? What's happening?
- What the fuck is he doing?

1686
01:20:57,910 --> 01:21:01,330
Marcus has been failed
by a lot of people over the years.

1687
01:21:04,500 --> 01:21:06,080
I think I might be the worst of all.

1688
01:21:10,450 --> 01:21:11,660
My whole life,

1689
01:21:11,750 --> 01:21:13,830
I've been obsessed
with earning the respect

1690
01:21:13,910 --> 01:21:15,200
of my own big brother.

1691
01:21:18,120 --> 01:21:19,580
My brother, Josh,

1692
01:21:20,660 --> 01:21:22,870
is one of the most impressive people
I've ever met.

1693
01:21:24,910 --> 01:21:26,500
From the moment I could walk,

1694
01:21:27,870 --> 01:21:30,250
all I just wanted to do
was earn his approval.

1695
01:21:31,830 --> 01:21:34,450
Man, even when I had it,
I couldn't see it.

1696
01:21:35,040 --> 01:21:38,500
That man checked himself out
of the hospital, that I put him in,

1697
01:21:39,370 --> 01:21:41,160
just to be here for me today.

1698
01:21:42,870 --> 01:21:45,870
The truth is, he never cared
about how successful I was.

1699
01:21:47,910 --> 01:21:49,330
Neither did Marcus...

1700
01:21:51,870 --> 01:21:53,080
or my wife, Deirdre...

1701
01:21:55,040 --> 01:21:58,620
who stood by me, even though
I became somebody she didn't recognize.

1702
01:22:00,040 --> 01:22:02,950
And, gosh, that type of love
is easy to take for granted, isn't it?

1703
01:22:04,500 --> 01:22:07,450
But unconditional love
is what being a brother is all about.

1704
01:22:09,500 --> 01:22:11,200
It's what being a family is all about.

1705
01:22:12,250 --> 01:22:13,950
God, Marcus understood that.

1706
01:22:15,700 --> 01:22:16,580
I didn't.

1707
01:22:20,120 --> 01:22:21,580
That's why I can't accept this award.

1708
01:22:25,750 --> 01:22:26,870
Hey, Rudd,

1709
01:22:26,950 --> 01:22:28,620
what the fuck are you doing?

1710
01:22:28,700 --> 01:22:31,410
Something I should've done a long
time ago. Get my car. Meet out front.

1711
01:22:31,500 --> 01:22:33,540
No, you need to get back out there.

1712
01:22:33,620 --> 01:22:36,910
That is not an ending.
You have an obligation to the show.

1713
01:22:38,040 --> 01:22:39,750
Fuck the show. I quit.

1714
01:22:41,080 --> 01:22:44,200
- Hon, I'm sorry I ruined your event.
- Oh, I'm so glad you did.

1715
01:22:48,540 --> 01:22:50,200
Deploy backup Rudd.

1716
01:22:54,910 --> 01:22:56,040
Love you, big bro.

1717
01:22:56,120 --> 01:22:57,750
- Love you too, man.
- Yeah.

1718
01:22:58,540 --> 01:23:02,160
I'd like to thank my wife, Deirdre,
for that incredibly gracious introduction.

1719
01:23:02,250 --> 01:23:04,500
I would also like to thank...

1720
01:23:07,120 --> 01:23:08,500
Rudd.

1721
01:23:09,450 --> 01:23:14,080
Seeing you open up like that in there
has given me the courage to say,

1722
01:23:14,950 --> 01:23:17,790
I've always been a little jealous of you.

1723
01:23:17,870 --> 01:23:21,370
- You, jealous of me?
- Oh, come on. Look at your life.

1724
01:23:21,870 --> 01:23:23,870
Look at this beautiful woman.

1725
01:23:23,950 --> 01:23:26,830
Two kick-ass kids. And what have I got?

1726
01:23:27,660 --> 01:23:30,660
- A 19-million-dollar house.
- Yeah.

1727
01:23:30,750 --> 01:23:32,450
And a McLaren P1.

1728
01:23:32,540 --> 01:23:35,700
And a different Instagram model
in my bed every night.

1729
01:23:35,790 --> 01:23:36,910
Two vineyards.

1730
01:23:37,000 --> 01:23:40,200
And a group chat
with Robert Downey Jr. and Simone Biles.

1731
01:23:40,290 --> 01:23:43,870
But what's important is what you have.

1732
01:23:44,580 --> 01:23:47,700
Your family, which is your legacy,

1733
01:23:47,790 --> 01:23:50,580
and I'm just glad to be a part of it.

1734
01:23:56,370 --> 01:23:57,540
Oh, hey.

1735
01:23:57,620 --> 01:23:59,160
I gotta go. Don't wait up.

1736
01:23:59,250 --> 01:24:00,410
Wait. Where are you going?

1737
01:24:01,370 --> 01:24:03,040
Going to get my little brother back.

1738
01:24:10,950 --> 01:24:12,910
I can't believe
you're letting me drive this thing.

1739
01:24:13,000 --> 01:24:14,830
Why? It's just a car.

1740
01:24:15,750 --> 01:24:18,290
So what's the plan?
He could literally be anywhere.

1741
01:24:19,870 --> 01:24:21,330
I think I know where he is.

1742
01:24:25,540 --> 01:24:27,620
Hey, roommate. I missed you.

1743
01:24:30,200 --> 01:24:31,250
Whoa. Who's that?

1744
01:24:35,200 --> 01:24:36,370
Jesus!

1745
01:24:36,450 --> 01:24:38,540
It's you, but made from lunch meat.

1746
01:24:38,620 --> 01:24:41,790
I have to do a new one every week,
or it attracts vermin.

1747
01:24:42,950 --> 01:24:47,370
That is the sweetest thing
anyone's ever done for me.

1748
01:24:50,160 --> 01:24:53,790
Man, you feel so much better
than roast beef.

1749
01:24:55,000 --> 01:24:56,620
I gave you a vagina.

1750
01:25:16,540 --> 01:25:17,580
Shit!

1751
01:25:18,160 --> 01:25:19,160
It's locked.

1752
01:25:19,250 --> 01:25:22,410
I guess I'll book us a hotel,
and we'll come back in the morning?

1753
01:25:24,450 --> 01:25:25,450
Rudd?

1754
01:25:27,120 --> 01:25:28,000
Rudd?

1755
01:25:34,950 --> 01:25:36,160
Marcus?

1756
01:25:36,250 --> 01:25:37,160
Marcus?

1757
01:25:39,700 --> 01:25:40,870
Marcus?

1758
01:25:41,620 --> 01:25:43,250
Ah, shit.

1759
01:25:46,790 --> 01:25:49,040
- Sorry.
- No, I'm sorry.

1760
01:25:49,120 --> 01:25:51,370
I'm so territorial about my window.

1761
01:25:51,870 --> 01:25:53,160
It's my toxic trait.

1762
01:25:53,790 --> 01:25:56,500
- Who are you looking for?
- Marcus Pinchel.

1763
01:25:56,580 --> 01:25:59,250
- Three windows over, one up.
- Thanks.

1764
01:26:02,750 --> 01:26:03,660
Shit.

1765
01:26:08,950 --> 01:26:10,830
Someone's climbing up the wall.

1766
01:26:10,910 --> 01:26:13,580
Mm. Let me guess. It's the Grinch again?

1767
01:26:13,660 --> 01:26:16,620
No, not this time. It's a big, strong guy.

1768
01:26:16,700 --> 01:26:17,540
Rudd?

1769
01:26:20,790 --> 01:26:21,910
What does he want?

1770
01:26:23,950 --> 01:26:25,790
Marcus wants to know what you want.

1771
01:26:25,870 --> 01:26:27,000
Tell him I wanna talk.

1772
01:26:27,080 --> 01:26:28,950
He wants me to burn down my high school.

1773
01:26:29,040 --> 01:26:29,950
What?

1774
01:26:30,040 --> 01:26:31,830
I'm coming in.

1775
01:26:31,910 --> 01:26:33,450
Whoa.

1776
01:26:33,540 --> 01:26:34,790
Jesus.

1777
01:26:38,160 --> 01:26:39,870
Okay, where are the cameras?

1778
01:26:40,580 --> 01:26:41,580
No cameras.

1779
01:26:42,160 --> 01:26:43,000
Just me.

1780
01:26:43,870 --> 01:26:47,000
S... so, what?
You finally feel bad for me or something?

1781
01:26:47,500 --> 01:26:49,870
Well, don't worry.
I'm right where I belong.

1782
01:26:49,950 --> 01:26:51,250
I don't need your pity.

1783
01:26:51,330 --> 01:26:53,200
I'm not here to pity you, Marcus.

1784
01:26:54,160 --> 01:26:55,500
I just wanna talk.

1785
01:26:57,700 --> 01:27:00,410
Look, I don't know
what came over me with this show.

1786
01:27:01,500 --> 01:27:04,160
I've just always wanted my brother
to look at me a certain way.

1787
01:27:06,790 --> 01:27:10,500
The truth is... and I didn't realize it
until you were gone,

1788
01:27:10,580 --> 01:27:12,540
but the way I want Josh to see me

1789
01:27:14,250 --> 01:27:15,580
is the way you see me.

1790
01:27:17,910 --> 01:27:20,580
I've been looking for it
ever since I was a kid.

1791
01:27:21,080 --> 01:27:23,160
It's been in front of me the whole time.

1792
01:27:25,750 --> 01:27:27,790
You're the brother
I always wanted, Marcus.

1793
01:27:32,790 --> 01:27:35,120
I'm just sorry
I hadn't been there for you.

1794
01:27:36,910 --> 01:27:39,540
And I'm not just talking about
these past few months.

1795
01:27:41,830 --> 01:27:44,250
And-And I'm sorry I wasn't there
when your parents died,

1796
01:27:45,620 --> 01:27:47,950
and you had to move into
that orphanage in Dunbar.

1797
01:27:53,040 --> 01:27:54,540
You read my emails?

1798
01:27:55,290 --> 01:27:56,660
Every single one of 'em.

1799
01:27:59,790 --> 01:28:01,700
I'm sorry you lost your brother, Manny.

1800
01:28:03,410 --> 01:28:05,620
You had to go through
the pain of that all alone.

1801
01:28:06,540 --> 01:28:08,950
Yeah. Manny was my best friend.

1802
01:28:11,000 --> 01:28:13,120
I never got to tell him I loved him.

1803
01:28:15,580 --> 01:28:17,330
Well, I'm not trying to replace him.

1804
01:28:18,660 --> 01:28:21,000
But I want you to know
that from here on out,

1805
01:28:22,450 --> 01:28:23,660
I'm there for you,

1806
01:28:24,870 --> 01:28:25,700
brother.

1807
01:28:27,540 --> 01:28:31,000
- I thought you said we weren't brothers.
- Yeah, I said a lot of stupid shit.

1808
01:28:33,750 --> 01:28:34,750
But you and I,

1809
01:28:36,200 --> 01:28:37,410
we're brothers for life.

1810
01:28:37,500 --> 01:28:39,330
Don't say it if you don't mean it.

1811
01:28:39,950 --> 01:28:41,080
Wouldn't dare.

1812
01:28:41,160 --> 01:28:44,080
Well, then, can you say it again?
'Cause I really liked hearing it.

1813
01:28:46,540 --> 01:28:47,750
Brothers for life.

1814
01:28:53,540 --> 01:28:54,910
Brothers for life.

1815
01:28:57,700 --> 01:28:58,700
All righty.

1816
01:29:01,950 --> 01:29:03,910
- Good luck.
- See you, Doc.

1817
01:29:04,830 --> 01:29:05,870
Hi.

1818
01:29:05,950 --> 01:29:07,700
Hey, Marcus.

1819
01:29:08,370 --> 01:29:10,750
There's something I need to say to you.

1820
01:29:12,290 --> 01:29:13,290
Yeah.

1821
01:29:17,040 --> 01:29:20,080
I'm... not a perfect person.

1822
01:29:21,500 --> 01:29:25,120
There's many things I wish... I didn't do.

1823
01:29:26,790 --> 01:29:28,870
But I continue learning.

1824
01:29:30,160 --> 01:29:32,580
I never meant to do those things to you.

1825
01:29:34,910 --> 01:29:37,580
And so, I have to say before I go...

1826
01:29:39,540 --> 01:29:44,410
<i>That I just want you to know</i>

1827
01:29:44,950 --> 01:29:49,250
<i>I found a reason for me</i>

1828
01:29:50,540 --> 01:29:54,700
<i>To change who I used to be</i>

1829
01:29:56,370 --> 01:30:00,330
<i>A reason to start over new</i>

1830
01:30:03,160 --> 01:30:05,040
<i>And the reason is...</i>

1831
01:30:13,700 --> 01:30:15,370
I'm sorry. I...

1832
01:30:15,450 --> 01:30:17,160
I can't do this right now, Mia.

1833
01:30:17,790 --> 01:30:22,750
I get it. It's gonna take some time
for me to earn back your trust.

1834
01:30:22,830 --> 01:30:24,120
What? No.

1835
01:30:24,200 --> 01:30:26,790
You kidding me?
We just nailed that whole moment.

1836
01:30:26,870 --> 01:30:29,290
We just sang a Hoobastank song together.

1837
01:30:29,370 --> 01:30:30,200
That was so hot.

1838
01:30:30,290 --> 01:30:32,580
We're gonna obliterate
each other's holes tonight.

1839
01:30:32,660 --> 01:30:35,660
Probably again in the morning.
That's gonna be a short session.

1840
01:30:35,750 --> 01:30:38,370
- I wanna walk crooked to work, girl.
- Yes, please.

1841
01:30:39,580 --> 01:30:44,000
It's just that, uh... Rudd and I have
some unfinished business to attend to.

1842
01:30:48,830 --> 01:30:50,000
<i>Me and baby brother</i>

1843
01:30:50,080 --> 01:30:52,410
Okay, we got this, baby. I ain't scared.

1844
01:30:52,500 --> 01:30:53,950
You sure you wanna do this?

1845
01:30:54,040 --> 01:30:55,790
- Absolutely.
- Been waiting for a while, huh?

1846
01:30:55,870 --> 01:30:57,370
- Uh-huh.
- Okay, we'll start easy.

1847
01:30:57,450 --> 01:30:58,660
One foot, left-handed.

1848
01:31:00,830 --> 01:31:02,620
Okay. Beginner's luck.

1849
01:31:02,700 --> 01:31:04,120
It's okay. It's okay.

1850
01:31:04,200 --> 01:31:06,160
- Too easy, big dog.
- I'm just warming up.

1851
01:31:06,250 --> 01:31:07,250
Check this out.

1852
01:31:07,950 --> 01:31:08,830
No!

1853
01:31:08,910 --> 01:31:09,870
- Oh shit.
- Fuck!

1854
01:31:09,950 --> 01:31:11,870
- Jesus. Marcus, you okay?
- Christ!

1855
01:31:11,950 --> 01:31:13,250
Oh my God.

1856
01:31:13,330 --> 01:31:14,450
Walk it off, baby.

1857
01:31:14,540 --> 01:31:16,790
- Redo, please.
- Yeah, yeah. Go ahead.

1858
01:31:16,870 --> 01:31:20,410
I'm not scared. I'm bringing
the thunder and the lightning.

1859
01:31:21,160 --> 01:31:23,450
- Oh my God!
- Oh shit.

1860
01:31:23,540 --> 01:31:25,160
- Jesus. Are you okay? Let's call it.
- Hoo!

1861
01:31:25,250 --> 01:31:27,120
No. Give me the goddamn ball.

1862
01:31:27,200 --> 01:31:28,250
- Okay.
- Check this out.

1863
01:31:28,330 --> 01:31:29,750
It's probably your concussion.

1864
01:31:29,830 --> 01:31:32,250
- Redo.
- Ah, shit. Redo. That was a warm-up.

1865
01:31:32,330 --> 01:31:34,200
Hee-yah! Dang it. Kobe!

1866
01:31:34,290 --> 01:31:37,330
- Hang on. This basket's bad.
- Something's up with it.

1867
01:31:37,410 --> 01:31:38,540
Did you notice?

1868
01:31:38,620 --> 01:31:39,870
Yes!

1869
01:31:39,950 --> 01:31:41,700
- Oh. Whoo!
- Nice!

1870
01:31:41,790 --> 01:31:43,950
- C'mon, now. Come on, now.
- All right.

1871
01:31:44,040 --> 01:31:46,500
- It's all on you. Catch up.
- Marcus!

1872
01:31:47,620 --> 01:31:49,450
<i>Me and baby brother</i>

1873
01:31:50,830 --> 01:31:52,750
<i>Used to run together</i>

1874
01:31:53,450 --> 01:31:56,040
<i>Hey, hey, hey, hey, yeah</i>

1875
01:31:56,120 --> 01:31:57,950
<i>Welcome one another...</i>

1876
01:31:58,040 --> 01:32:00,580
<i>Broker Brothers</i> commercial,
scene one, take one.

1877
01:32:01,080 --> 01:32:03,410
- Hi. I'm Rudd Landy.
- And I'm Marcus Landy.

1878
01:32:03,500 --> 01:32:06,370
And we're the Broker Brothers.
We put the "real" in real estate.

1879
01:32:06,450 --> 01:32:08,370
And we can help <i>you</i> find your forever home

1880
01:32:08,450 --> 01:32:10,250
or that perfect rental
that suits your needs.

1881
01:32:10,330 --> 01:32:11,700
- Right, Marcus?
- That's right, Rudd.

1882
01:32:11,790 --> 01:32:14,950
But keep in mind, nothing is forever,
and there's no such thing as perfect.

1883
01:32:15,040 --> 01:32:18,370
Inevitably, we all meet our maker
in the end.

1884
01:32:18,450 --> 01:32:20,910
Cut. Can we try a more upbeat version?

1885
01:32:21,000 --> 01:32:22,080
I was trying to be real.

1886
01:32:22,160 --> 01:32:24,200
- No. Let's just go again right away.
- Yeah.

1887
01:32:24,870 --> 01:32:26,120
You want a back massage?

1888
01:32:27,450 --> 01:32:28,540
Hard pass.

1889
01:32:29,950 --> 01:32:31,790
You could use a back massage.

1890
01:32:31,870 --> 01:32:33,620
And I studied in Bangkok.

1891
01:32:33,700 --> 01:32:35,540
It's gonna hurt for a while.

1892
01:32:35,620 --> 01:32:37,250
But you gotta trust me.

1893
01:32:38,200 --> 01:32:39,620
Whoa!

1894
01:32:42,160 --> 01:32:44,620
I'm sorry. I thought I saw you on fire.

1895
01:32:46,700 --> 01:32:48,040
Get in the fucking...

1896
01:32:51,160 --> 01:32:52,500
Thank... Oh.

1897
01:32:54,200 --> 01:32:57,370
Oh yeah. Call me the Trash Heap
from <i>Fraggle Rock.</i>

1898
01:32:57,450 --> 01:32:58,790
I don't know that reference.

1899
01:32:58,870 --> 01:33:01,750
Oh, well, it's Jim Henson's
lesser-known work!

1900
01:33:01,830 --> 01:33:03,790
Get on your knees, bitch.

1901
01:33:03,870 --> 01:33:05,540
You wanna be my toilet?

1902
01:33:07,330 --> 01:33:09,830
I'm sorry.
What was I... We'll go back into it.

1903
01:33:10,830 --> 01:33:13,250
<i>Broker Brothers</i> commercial,
scene one, take five.

1904
01:33:13,330 --> 01:33:14,870
Hi. I'm Rudd Landy.

1905
01:33:14,950 --> 01:33:18,040
And I'm Marcus Landy.
We are the Broker Brothers.

1906
01:33:18,120 --> 01:33:20,120
And if you don't like
the house we found for you,

1907
01:33:20,200 --> 01:33:21,790
we'll buy it back at double the price.

1908
01:33:21,870 --> 01:33:23,830
- No. Cut. Cut. We're not doing that.
- Why?

1909
01:33:23,910 --> 01:33:26,950
- Boom in the shot.
- Oh shit. Sorry. My bad.

1910
01:33:27,040 --> 01:33:29,580
Fuck! Fuck. I'm a fucking idiot.

1911
01:33:29,660 --> 01:33:32,750
- You're doing amazing, okay? Just relax.
- You calling me a liar, bro?

1912
01:33:32,830 --> 01:33:34,450
- Yeah, I guess I am.
- Oh, you...

1913
01:33:34,540 --> 01:33:36,040
- Guys...
- Easy! Easy!

1914
01:33:36,660 --> 01:33:39,080
Meryl Streep hasn't given
an acceptance speech in 20 years.

1915
01:33:39,160 --> 01:33:41,830
It's a small Filipino man
who stands in for her,

1916
01:33:41,910 --> 01:33:43,660
and we paste her onto him.

1917
01:33:43,750 --> 01:33:44,580
And it works.

1918
01:33:44,660 --> 01:33:46,040
Let me spot you.

1919
01:33:46,120 --> 01:33:47,290
And three.

1920
01:33:48,200 --> 01:33:49,910
And... four.

1921
01:33:50,000 --> 01:33:53,160
And... I didn't brush my teeth.
I'm so sorry.

1922
01:33:53,250 --> 01:33:56,330
You are my rock,
my mountain. You are my everything.

1923
01:33:56,410 --> 01:33:57,500
- And--
- Get off of me!

1924
01:33:57,580 --> 01:33:59,000
Okay, all right. Okay.

1925
01:34:01,120 --> 01:34:02,040
Success!

1926
01:34:02,120 --> 01:34:03,410
Slightly to the left.

1927
01:34:03,500 --> 01:34:06,410
- Camera left. Other way.
- To your right a little bit.

1928
01:34:06,500 --> 01:34:08,370
- God! Oh!
- Can you get it in your mouth?

1929
01:34:09,950 --> 01:34:11,830
Ah, it's up my nose! It's in my no...

1930
01:34:13,250 --> 01:34:15,410
This is crude humor.

1931
01:34:15,500 --> 01:34:20,450
And I will not be a part of a project
with such disgusting taste.

1932
01:34:20,540 --> 01:34:22,620
This would pair nicely with Rudd's ass.

1933
01:34:24,040 --> 01:34:25,700
What else do you wanna do,
you little freak?

1934
01:34:25,790 --> 01:34:28,040
69, 72, 83.

1935
01:34:28,120 --> 01:34:29,410
I don't know any of those.

1936
01:34:29,500 --> 01:34:33,500
John Tesh composed
the <i>NBA on NBC</i> theme song on that piano.

1937
01:34:33,580 --> 01:34:35,330
And that song fucks.

1938
01:34:36,870 --> 01:34:39,830
<i>Broker Brothers</i> commercial,
scene one, take 39.

1939
01:34:40,330 --> 01:34:43,330
Broker Brothers
will out-muscle the competition!

1940
01:34:43,410 --> 01:34:47,000
We'll make sure you get
the most ripped, bulging...

1941
01:34:47,080 --> 01:34:49,290
- Ah, cut, man. I can't do this.
- Oh, really?

1942
01:34:49,370 --> 01:34:51,950
Aw, come on!
Don't be such a stick in the Rudd!

1943
01:34:54,700 --> 01:34:56,750
That was right under our nose
this whole time.

1944
01:34:58,370 --> 01:35:01,620
<i>On</i> NYC Hustlers<i>,
there's a new season</i>

1945
01:35:01,700 --> 01:35:04,000
<i>and a new reason for attitude</i>

1946
01:35:04,080 --> 01:35:05,910
<i>when we add two dudes.</i>

1947
01:35:06,000 --> 01:35:10,540
<i>There's never a dull "bro-ment"
when these two guys are around.</i>